In the Venn diagram of candy lovers and the chronically online, those in the middle intersection are particularly enamored by viral food trends and their ability to provoke excitement and curiosity. How many kinds of Swedish candy are there? Does a bowl of tiny pancakes make cereal? Why is this chocolate bar so expensive?

I overheard a guy at Walmart ask the last question out loud as he passed the display of Lindt Dubai Style Chocolate bars. At nearly $15 for a 5.3 oz bar, Lindt’s newest product boasts costly ingredients, eye-catching green packaging, and generally stylish vibe. Invented by a Dubai chocolatier and popularized by social media, Dubai chocolate is a milk chocolate shell filled with sweet pistachio cream and kadayif, or shredded cooked phyllo pastry. Lindt’s riff on the sought-after confection consists of Swiss milk chocolate made in Germany, with the addition of almonds, hazelnuts, and sugared pistachios in the filling.

So, is the bar worth the splurge? I guess you could say I’m still dubai-ous.

Look, I like Dubai chocolate, I like Lindt chocolate, and I’ve often wondered if I’m singlehandedly putting my local candy store owner’s children through college. Despite these truths, Lindt’s Dubai Style Chocolate Bar left me unimpressed.

The milk chocolate itself is wonderful—lushly silky, sweet, and creamy, with notes of caramel and vanilla that make its flavor distinctive.

The filling felt like a letdown, especially compared to the viral photos of Dubai chocolate that depict overflowing green goo like something out of a Nickelodeon cartoon. (Did the Rugrats Reptar Bar foretell Dubai chocolate? Discuss.) Lindt’s filling is a modest layer of sweetened pistachio paste rich with texture: gritty bits of nuts and threads of phyllo that remind me of crispy shredded wheat cereal. It tastes nutty, salty, and good, but the flavor is a mixed medley of almond, hazelnut, and pistachio—the latter of which should be the star. In the context of the Dubai trend, the almonds and hazelnuts add more filler than filling.

The milk chocolate outshines the filling. Even with a better chocolate-to-filling ratio, the filling would benefit from a substantial addition of pistachio cream to boost the pistachio flavor, balance creamy and crispy textures, and stand a chance against the chocolate’s unique taste.

The Lindt Dubai Style Chocolate Bar is difficult to rate because, while a nutty bar of Swiss chocolate is always a pleasure, it does not fulfill the creamy, crispy, and pistachio-y promises of Dubai chocolate that—to some—justify the hefty price tag. If you are willing to part with the green in your wallet, look for a brand that provides more green filling in its chocolate.

Purchased Price: $14.97
Purchased at: Walmart
Size: 5.3 oz (150 g) bar
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (per 2 pieces, or 1/5 bar) 170 calories, 11 grams of fat, 6 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 35 milligrams of sodium, 15 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 12 grams of sugar, and 3 grams of protein.

I know there are Santa-hatted zombies who advocate for the head first consumption of anthropomorphic treats. But as gingerbread-based lifeforms are known to bolt at the first sign of milk, I prioritize immobilization.

With no central nervous system, a headless treat may leave your cookie craving unfulfilled. For inexperienced or squeamish cookie eaters, Lindt is offering up Lindor Limited Edition Gingerbread Truffles. Sourced from the finest cuts of cookie anatomy, the classic Lindor milk chocolate shell is infused with gingerbread cookie pieces encapsulating a gingerbread truffle filling.

The cookie bits add a pleasant grit to the standard and delicious chocolate shell, but all of the limited edition flavor comes by way of the creamy truffle center. As gingerbread cookies are far from creamy in their natural state, liquefying them must be a disturbing transmogrification that only those haunted by the memories of gingerbread houses gone awry can stomach.

The trauma of these tortured souls is evidenced by their Bond-villain like maniacal laughter as licorice bound gingerbread people are slowly lowered into magmatic vats of palm kernel oil.

Unfortunately, the disturbingly produced core is much sweeter than any gingerbread cookie I’ve eaten and comes across with almost floral notes. These Mr. Big inspired chocolatiers must take particular umbrage with the housewives of the ginger-burbs where saccharin-based Botox is all the rage. A little less literal sweet revenge and a bit more bitter molasses may have produced a better balance and left a few more cookie families intact for the holidays.

While I possess the confectionary architectural aptitude of a blind Fraggle, I hold no ill will towards gingerkind. Even so, Lindor Gingerbread Truffles are worth trying for the novelty, but I will embrace my role as the apex predator of cookie munching interspersed with bites of a standard truffle when the mood for both strikes.

Purchased Price: $5.94
Size: 8.5 oz. bag
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (3 Balls) 220 calories, 17 grams of fat, 12 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 35 milligrams of sodium, 16 grams of carbohydrates, 14 grams of sugar, 1 gram of dietary fiber, and 2 grams of protein.

Mint and chocolate go so well together that they should have a celebrity couple-like name similar to Brangelina.

Chocomint? Mintolate? Chont? Mincho?

Whatever we decided to call the duo, if you love them, these Lindor Lindt Limited Edition Peppermint Cookie Milk Chocolate Truffles will have you melting as quickly as their milk chocolate exterior does when you pop one into the 98.6 degree chamber known as your mouth because they are delightful.

The filling gets its flavor from peppermint oil. But if you’re someone who wants the mint to be strong enough to clear your sinuses, these tasty balls are not curiously strong enough for you. A part of me wishes it was mintier, but another part thinks the Thin Mint cookie-like mintiness was just right.

Speaking of cookies, there are tiny, crunchy choco-cookie bits in the chocolate that give the truffles a texture other than internal body heat-melted chocolate. There’s a decent amount of cookie bits, but they offer an unsatisfying crunch.

It’s as if Lindt gave factory workers a box of Thin Mints and plates during their break, had them eat the cookies over the plates, collected whatever crumbs fell, and then dumped them into the vat with the creamy milk chocolate.

I really wanted a cookie crunch and not a cookie crumb crunch, so I wish Lindt included larger cookie bits or somehow, underneath the milk chocolate, created a layer of cookie that holds the smooth minty truffle filling. The latter doesn’t sound complex, does it? Sure, Lindt would have to spend millions of dollars to build a completely new manufacturing process, but it would be totally worth it to make my sugar-fueled dream come true.

Even though I complained about the mintiness and crunchiness of these Lindt Limited Edition Peppermint Cookie Truffles, they are minor complaints that melt away every time I let one of these delicious morsels melt in my mouth.

(Nutrition Facts – 3 balls – 220 calories, 150 calories from fat, 17 grams of fat, 12 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 45 milligrams of sodium, 16 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 14 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $4.49
Size: 6 oz. bag
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Milk chocolate and minty filling is velvety when it melts in your mouth. Thin Mint-like mintiness. A decent amount of cookie bits. Complaints melting away as the truffle melts in my mouth.
Cons: Might not have enough mint for you. Might not have enough cookie crunch for you. Might not have enough truffles in the bag for you.

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: 3.5 oz.
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 9 out of 10
Pros: It did make my tummy yummy. Smooth and sweet milk chocolate. Almost makes me forget about my beloved, but discontinued Cookies & Cream Twix. Big bar. Stuffed with cookies and cream filling. Small cookie bits give the bar light, but satisfying crunch. Uses “cream” instead of “creme” in its name.
Cons: Fifty percent of your daily recommended saturated fat in one serving (4 pieces). So good that it makes me want to eat more than one serving in one sitting. Sweet cream filling might make the bar cloying for some. Cookie bits aren’t really noticeable in terms of flavor; they get lost in the milk chocolate.

Nutrition Facts: 4 pieces – 220 calories, 130 calories from fat, 15 grams of fat, 10 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 10 milligrams of cholesterol, 45 milligrams of sodium, 22 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 20 grams of sugar, 2 grams of protein.