REVIEW: California Pizza Kitchen BBQ ‘Don’t Call Me Chicken’ Pizza

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California Pizza Kitchen BBQ Don t Call Me Chicken Pizza Full

What is the California Pizza Kitchen BBQ “Don’t Call Me Chicken” Pizza?

It’s CPK’s Original BBQ Chicken Pizza, but with a plant-based chicken substitute. So it has the same smoked Gouda, red onions, fresh cilantro, and BBQ sauce as the original, but the bawk bawk meat has been replaced with a 100 percent meatless vegetarian product that’s made from soy and wheat.

How is it?

California Pizza Kitchen BBQ Don t Call Me Chicken Pizza Closeup

Well, it tastes like a California Pizza Kitchen Original BBQ Chicken Pizza. Although, not EXACTLY like one. The flavors of the cheese, onions, cilantro, and especially the BBQ sauce do an admirable job at masking the fact that the protein is not chicken. Even when biting into the plant-based meat with the other ingredients, it’s difficult to tell it’s something other than chicken.

But, with the pizza I ordered, I thought the barbecue sauce flavor wasn’t as bold as what I’ve tasted with the many regular Original BBQ Chicken Pizzas I’ve had. Of course, maybe it was just with my order, and you may have a different experience. But, overall, I did enjoy it, and most eaters won’t be able to tell it’s faux faux meat.

California Pizza Kitchen BBQ Don t Call Me Chicken Pizza Soy

However, that changes when one tries to eat the plant-based meat on its own. It looks marinated, but it tastes like what I imagine a soy and wheat product would taste like. In other words, it’s a bit bland. So, Public Service Announcement alert, don’t eat the plant-based chicken by itself.

Anything else you need to know?

Plant-based meats haven’t been about being a healthier option for us. It’s been about being a healthier option for our planet. Holy cow! I mean, holy faux cow! Did I write that? That is deep. Sorry. It’s about using fewer resources to produce the plants to make the meat substitute than what it would take to raise animals for meat.

California Pizza Kitchen BBQ Don t Call Me Chicken Pizza Slice

But if you’re curious, a slice of this has roughly the same nutrition numbers as a slice of The Original BBQ Chicken, except the one with real meat has ten more calories, ten more milligrams of cholesterol, ten fewer milligrams of sodium, and one more gram of protein per slice.

Also, at least at my local CPK, a $1 premium over the original version.

Conclusion:

California Pizza Kitchen’s BBQ “Don’t Call Me Chicken” Pizza is a delicious vegetarian version of its classic menu item.

Purchased Price: $17.99*
Size: N/A
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 slice) 180 calories, 5 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 10 milligrams of cholesterol, 490 milligrams of sodium, 25 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 3 grams of sugar, and 10 grams of protein.

*Because I live on a rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, things are a bit pricier here. You’ll probably pay less than I did.

REVIEW: Pizza Hut Beyond Italian Sausage Pizza

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Pizza Hut Beyond Italian Sausage Pizza Box

As I was going through the options to order my Pizza Hut Beyond Italian Sausage Pizza online, I thought about getting an order with half regular Italian sausage and half Beyond Italian sausage to compare.

But then I thought, “How will I know which is which if they’re supposed to be alike?” Also, I thought, “Why would I do this?” It’s not as if I don’t know what Pizza Hut’s Italian sausage tastes like. I’ve eaten my current body weight in it over my lifetime, so I’m pretty sure I know what it tastes like. So I went all in with the meat substitute.

Pizza Hut Beyond Italian Sausage Pizza Whole

The pizza features Pizza Hut’s usual cheese, sauce, and crust, but it’s topped with Beyond Meat’s plant-based Italian sausage. The meat substitute company has planted it plant-based flag in several fast food products over the past two years from Dunkin’, Carl’s Jr., and Del Taco.

After picking it up, the first thing I noticed was how it didn’t smell like a Pizza Hut pizza with Italian sausage. Even during my trip home in an enclosed 2003 Toyota Corolla and after peeling back the box’s lid when I got home, my nose couldn’t sense the familiar aroma of spices.

Pizza Hut Beyond Italian Sausage Pizza Closeup

While it lacks the aroma that accompanies Italian sausage, it certainly looks the part. I could even see dried rosemary peeking through some of the chunks. Wait. Is that dried rosemary or a tiny sunflower seed?

Update: I have been told on Twitter that it’s a fennel seed.

Pizza Hut Beyond Italian Sausage Pizza Closer Up

As for the flavor, I found the plant-based Italian sausage to be noticeably less flavorful than The Hut’s regular Italian sausage. All the right seasonings are there, but at 70-80 percent potency of the regular version’s flavor. But if I wasn’t someone who has eaten my body weight Pizza Hut Italian sausage, I probably wouldn’t have noticed a difference, especially when it’s swimming on top of cheese and sauce.

What was even more noticeable was the texture of the sausage substitute. Compared with the regular stuff, the pieces were slightly dried out after being in Pizza Hut’s proprietary super ovens. Also, and I don’t know if this has anything to do with what I mentioned above, the plant-based sausage seems a lot less greasy.

Despite the lack of aroma, being less flavorful, and having a slightly dried out texture, I enjoyed the Pizza Hut Beyond Italian Sausage. I guess all those issues aren’t complete dealbreakers to me. Although I recognize that for some (or many) of you, they might be.

Pizza Hut Beyond Italian Sausage Pizza Slice

How I feel about this is the same as how I feel about the Impossible Whopper. It’s not as good as the original, but it’s good enough that I’d order it again. At this time, I don’t expect plant-based meats to equal the real stuff, but I do expect it to come close, which this does.

Purchased Price: $16.99*
Size: Large
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: Not available at time of publication.

*Because I live on a rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, things are a bit pricier here. You’ll probably pay less than I did.

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REVIEW: Dunkin’ Chai Oatmilk Latte

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Dunkin Chai Oatmilk Latte Cup

Much like that dramatic period piece movie that comes out in the 11th hour for Oscar consideration, oatmilk has come to win over all our hearts in the tail end of this year.

While I was familiar with it from the wall of milk substitutes in my local stores, it really grabbed my attention when Dunkin’ started to advertise it heavily. The chain has gone through an extensive rebrand over the last year. Even my closest store just reopened from a lengthy remodel. So I was excited to give the new drink and Dunkin’ a chance.

The siren call of oatmilk was too loud to ignore when I saw they were offering a Chai Oatmilk Latte. According to Dunkin’, it’s a lightly sweetened blend of chai spices, including cinnamon, cardamom, and nutmeg, combined with oatmilk. You can get the tea drink hot or cold, but since we’re going into full fall/winter cozy mode, I opted for hot.

Upon first getting the drink, I took a moment to take a whiff of it. The blend of spices was strong. Don’t mistake my saying “strong” with overpowering. Chai is successful to me when it has a bold scent and flavor that is enjoyable without feeling like I walked into a Bath & Body Works. Oftentimes when you are getting drinks poured from premixed concentrates, the chai flavors don’t balance and can be completely overpowering or completely overpowered and bland from too much sugar. In this case, the drink exceeded my expectations for a fast food chai. I think this is also due, in part, to the oatmilk.

When I tried oatmilk on its own recently, I found it to have a sweet and earthy flavor. It is almost the perfect companion for coffee/tea drinks in that way. Most creamers (particularly flavored ones) add a sweetness that overshadows the coffee or tea. Oatmilk, on the other hand, seems to make the beverage better while not taking over the show.

Dunkin Chai Oatmilk Latte Foam

Each sip of this Chai Oatmilk Latte was smooth and rich without being heavy. I really appreciate how well the oatmilk in this drink foamed! Many milk substitutes don’t get as foamy or don’t manage to last longer than the first sip, but here the oatmilk foam hung in there through the whole drink. Even giving me just a little of that “bottom of the cup” foam.

My only real criticism was that it wasn’t piping hot. I don’t think it was sitting long (I used mobile ordering), but the store was cranking out orders, so it’s possible.

Dunkin Chai Oatmilk Latte Sign

Also, and this is a minor annoyance, my husband’s iced gingerbread latte came in the cute holiday cup, but mine was in the everyday Dunkin’ cup. So much for getting those super cute pics for “the ‘gram.” Lastly, I opted for a medium even though the app defaulted to a large. I’m glad I did as I think (especially since the temp was a little off) by the end of a large, I would have experienced major diminishing returns of my enjoyment of the item.

Dunkin’s Chai Oatmilk Latte was excellent, and I’m excited to add this item to my rotation of special seasonal drinks.

Purchased Price: $3.89
Size: Medium (14 oz)
Purchased at: Dunkin’ Donuts
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 250 calories, 4 grams of fat, 0.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 160 milligrams of sodium, 53 grams of carbohydrates, 4 grams of fiber, 33 grams of sugar, and 3 grams of protein.

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REVIEW: Sonic Espresso Shake

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Sonic Espresso Shake Cup

I consider myself a late adopter of “hot, caffeinated beverages.” I didn’t become a regular coffee drinker until my early 30s, and never had an espresso until a couple of years later.

This is probably why I’m not generally one to opt for coffee, mocha, or espresso-flavored inclusions to my other foods or beverages. Mocha turkey sandwich? Pass. Coffee-rubbed pepperoni on my pizza? No thank you.

One exception to the “dear coffee, please do not mate with my other food” rule are sweets. Coffee — and its coffee-adjacent friends — lend themselves quite naturally to things like cakes, pies, and ice creams. And because a milkshake is but ice cream and milk, it only makes sense that one might infuse it with a caffeinated beverage.

Sonic Espresso Shake Top

Enter Sonic’s new Espresso Shake. According to Sonic’s website, its shake blends vanilla ice cream with “original cold brew iced coffee,” which, okay, I know I’ve established I’m a novice when it comes to hot go-go juice, but aren’t “coffee” and “espresso” two different things? I mean, espresso is coffee, but it’s generally made in a different way and is a far more concentrated substance. But I guess like me, maybe Sonic doesn’t have an espresso machine, and so here we are.

Sonic Espresso Shake Straw

Sonic’s shakes, for the uninitiated, are usually pretty consistent with their viscosity. They’re somewhere between “sucking this hard on the straw hurts my cheeks” and “this is a bit too runny to warrant a spoon.” In other words, optimal milkshake consistency. What is also consistently good is Sonic’s ice cream, which is perfectly creamy and perfectly sweet.

Now that brings us to the flavoring. If Sonic has an issue with frozen drink construction, this is it. With my first taste, my thought was, “Oh, hey, I like this.” The espresso flavor was much milder than I’d been anticipating, though certainly present. (And after reading on the website how they make it, I guess maybe now I know why it was so muted.) My second and third sips were fairly similar, but the fourth left me wondering, “Wait, what happened to the slight coffee taste?” It had disappeared, and I was left with nothing more than a creamy vanilla milkshake.

This went on for a few more sips from the straw, and then, boom, another coffee pocket. Now, I understand that I might not get a blob of banana in every drink of a banana shake, but how Sonic can make a liquid add-in so hit or miss is perplexing. It would have been almost impressive, really, had it not been so disappointing. I wanted more coffee taste, not less.

Perhaps making the milkshake with coffee ice cream would have upped the wow factor. (Or, for that matter, given it a wow factor.) Maybe I should have gone with the Oreo Espresso Shake because don’t Oreo pieces make most things more palatable? As it stands, I’m not sure I’d order the Espresso Shake again — not with so many other Sonic shake options at my disposal.

Purchased Price: $3.19
Size: Small
Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: Unavailable on Sonic’s website

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REVIEW: McDonald’s Blueberry Muffin, Apple Fritter, and Cinnamon Roll

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McDonald s Blueberry Muffin Innards

The McCafe brand has been an undeniable success for McDonald’s all around the globe. Its expanded coffee offerings have allowed the company to keep up with Starbucks with the added benefit of establishing a retail brand visible in the coffee aisle of grocery stores.

You can pull up to the drive-thru speaker and order a large, iced, non-fat Caramel Macchiato with an extra shot of espresso, hazelnut syrup, a chocolate drizzle, and whipped cream while also getting a McNuggets Happy Meal with a Buzz Lightyear toy for your kid. But if you ever craved a treat to accompany your obnoxiously complex McCafe drink, you were usually left with the choice of a handheld apple pie or a rather uninspiring chocolate chip cookie.

McDonald’s has wisely decided to expand its once meager baked goods selection by introducing the McCafe Blueberry Muffin, Apple Fritter, and Cinnamon Roll.

The Blueberry Muffin comes surrounded by a lovely tulip-style muffin wrapper to help distract from the fact that it was handed to me in the same bag as a packet of tangy bbq sauce. The muffin is adorned with a streusel crumb topping and a sprinkling of crystallized sugar that adds a really nice, subtle crunch when consuming.

McDonald s Blueberry Muffin

It is very tender and moist with somewhat sparse but delicious blueberries mixed throughout. There is a slight aftertaste of either a preservative or artificial flavor that I find common in boxed blueberry muffin mixes. While I would have to say that it is borderline too sweet for a blueberry muffin, I think the texture and overall flavor make it a nice addition to McDonald’s menu.

McDonald s Apple Fritter

Apple Fritters are never much to look, and the McCafe offering is no exception. It’s a brown, bumpy mound with a glazed outside that gives way to a dense center with abundant swirls of cinnamon. When biting in, you instantly get the warm cinnamon filling your mouth, followed closely by the tart apple flavor.

McDonald s Apple Fritter Innards

The light icing adds just the right amount of sweetness, and the dense but tender texture is perfect for a fritter. As one of my favorite treats, I love an apple fritter to have a crispy edge, which this did not. It could also benefit from more abundant apple pieces. But this is the treat I’ll be craving next time I pull into the drive-thru.

McDonald s Cinnamon Roll

The Cinnamon Roll looks the part, served warm with deep valleys of sugar and cinnamon in between the swirled dough and enough cream cheese icing to run down the sides but not flooding the entire roll with an overwhelming sweetness. From the moment I first tried to cut off a piece, I could tell that the outside had gotten tough, no doubt from being reheated.

McDonald s Cinnamon Roll Innards

Perhaps it once had that ideal slightly doughy, gooey center, but lost it in the microwave, sacrificed for the sake of quick service. It is a real shame that the texture is too tough because the cinnamon flavor and the cream cheese frosting are spot on, with the overall level of sweetness being just right. As a big fan of McDonald’s Cinnamon Melts, I can’t help but wish the company just revived it instead because it is a far superior product.

Purchased Price: $1.99 (Blueberry Muffin), $2.19 (Apple Fritter), $2.49 (Cinnamon Roll)
Size: N/A
Rating: 7 out of 10 (Blueberry Muffin), 9 out of 10 (Apple Fritter), 5 out of 10 (Cinnamon Roll)
Nutrition Facts: Blueberry Muffin – 470 calories, 22 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 35 milligrams of cholesterol, 360 milligrams of sodium, 64 grams of carbohydrates, 36 grams of sugar, 2 grams of fiber, and 6 grams of protein. Apple Fritter – 510 calories, 29 grams of fat, 12 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 360 milligrams of sodium, 58 grams of carbohydrates, 28 grams of sugar, 3 grams of fiber, and 5 grams of protein. Cinnamon Roll – 560 calories, 17 grams of fat, 8 grams of saturated fat, 35 milligrams of cholesterol, 490 milligrams of sodium, 92 grams of carbohydrates, 46 grams of sugar, 8 grams of fiber, and 9 grams of protein.

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