Let’s get this out of the way. Dairy Queen’s April Blizzard of the Month, Peanut Butter Cookie Dough, does NOT contain cookie dough that is peanut butter flavored. Rather, peanut butter topping is blended with vanilla soft serve and filled with chocolate chip cookie dough and choco chunks.

While I’m not the brightest tool in the shed, I expected peanut butter cookies and not merely “topping.” It’s not unlike the unfulfilled promise of the Star Wars prequels. Sure, Star Wars: The Phantom Menace has both “stars” and “wars”, but many expecting to see the “Star Wars” of the beloved original trilogy were sorely disappointed.

That said, the chocolate chip cookie dough and choco chunks work well together. The chunks add a pleasant snap and welcome contrast to the buttery base and soft, gritty cookie dough pieces.

The real draw though is the top-billed combo with peanut butter. The topping description is apt as it creates a uniform and smooth peanut butter ice cream with only a rare vanilla heavy bite. It’s not overly potent, but with no concentrated gobs of the luscious legume, that is to be expected.

Despite worshiping at the altar of Mr. Peanut, I feel, though tasty, the peanut butter topping flavored ice cream clashes with the mix-ins. The cookie dough, in particular, is slightly masked whereas the standard cookie dough Blizzard is enhanced by the complementary fudge.

In the end, I suspect chocolate chip cookie dough fans will be disappointed that the flavor is muted. Conversely, peanut butter lovers will wish they had fulfilled the tantalizing promise of the name by using peanut butter cookie dough. What we are left with is something Jar Jar would say “isa okeeday, no bombad and missa thinkin some people ganna be little bitty underwhelmt.”

Purchased Price: $3.59
Size: Small
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Small) 730 calories, 31 grams of fat, 17 grams of saturated fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 50 milligrams of cholesterol, 360 milligrams of sodium, 99 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 76 grams of sugar, and 14 grams of protein..

St. Patrick’s Day is almost upon us which means enough mint-flavored products to choke a leprechaun.

Case in point, Dairy Queen’s Mint Oreo Blizzard is the returning flavor of the month for March. Oreo cookies and creme de menthe mint topping are blended with vanilla soft serve.

Mind you, I can find no evidence that mint has anything to do with the Emerald Isle or its icons like St. Patrick Star or Lucky the Leprechaun. Maybe I don’t have the firmest grasp on my Irish ancestry either.

Despite the description, I could not detect even a hint of the “creme de menthe” part of the mint topping. Given that the Mint Oreo Blizzard has been described as “cool mint” in past years, I suspect this is a marketing change only — reinforced by conflicting advertising — but I cannot be certain as I have not tried this previously.

Perhaps the change is due to the mint flavor being decidedly not cool. It’s not so uncool as to be caught hanging out with me playing Magic: The Gathering after chess club in high school. More like, this mint was voted most likely to have a white picket fence and 2.5 kids. It’s a consistently mellow companion that enhances the vanilla base, but it doesn’t ever truly excite the taste buds.

Meanwhile, the Oreo cookie pieces range from tiny bits to reasonably sized chunks that pair as well with the reserved ice cream base as they do with most things…except for Swedish Fish.

Seriously, Nabisco, even Dr. Moreau would have been too squeamish to pull the trigger on that abomination.

Bottom line, this is a regular Oreo Blizzard with a mild mint-flavored base. There’s nothing to complain about here, but it also won’t leave you dancing a jaunty jig either.

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: Mini
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Mini) 400 calories, 13 grams of fat, 7 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 30 milligrams of cholesterol, 230 milligrams of sodium, 61 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 47 grams of sugar, and 8 grams of protein.

Strawberries and chocolate are as synonymous with Valentine’s Day as the Patriots are to the Super Bowl. Siding with the 99 percent of the country that does not associate romance with Tom Terrific emblazoned bed sheets, Dairy Queen is taking inspiration from the chocolate-covered fruit for February’s Blizzard of The Month -— Dipped Strawberry with Ghirardelli Blizzard.

An apparent upgrade of the bygone Choco Chunk Strawberry Blizzard, this treat features strawberry topping blended with vanilla soft serve and Ghirardelli chocolate chunks along with a sexier title.  

With a creamy pink pelagic canvas bestrewn with dark chocolate isles and ruby red strawberry reefs, it certainly looks like a dessert from Cupid’s freezer. The vanilla base combined with the strawberry syrup create a flavor closer to the fruit’s Fragaria roots than that of artificial chemical.

As for the advertised Ghirardelli pieces, they come in both dark and white chocolate and are immediately recognizable as the genuine article. The occasional strawberry chunk and bitter chocolate pairing is as good as a Brady to Gronk Iso slant, but unlike their NFL counterparts, the connection is infrequent.

The chocolate pieces are smaller and more numerous which leads to many bites of bitter chocolate that overwhelm the strawberry topping alone. The white chocolate chips on the other hand deserve their own Lombardi, but they are too sparse for my liking. I found only three or four of them in my bowl, but the hint of buttery flavor meshed exceptionally well with the other elements.

Overall, the topping and fruit pieces create a delightful base and the Ghirardelli chocolate pieces are the real deal if a little darker than I would have liked. Quasi-retuning flavor or not, I’m glad DQ opted to give us the holiday-inspired Dipped Strawberries and Ghirardelli Chocolate over something more novel like “Brady’s Deflated Brownie Bash.”

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: Mini
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Mini) 350 calories, 15 grams of fat, 10 grams of saturated fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 30 milligrams of cholesterol, 115 milligrams of sodium, 48 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 40 grams of sugar, and 8 grams of protein.