REVIEW: Nabisco Chewy Chips Ahoy! Gooey Caramel Cookies

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Chewy Chips Ahoy Gooey Caramel

The Chewy Chips Ahoy! Gooey Caramel cookies are a lot smaller than the Chocofudge and Megafudge Chips Ahoy! Chewy Gooey Cookies we reviewed last year.

What kind of size difference are we talking about?

In cookie terms, they’re slightly wider than an Oreo. For those of you who’ve never had an Oreo, I’m going to put it into terms that might help you understand. If you saw someone with areolas the size of the Chewy Chips Ahoy! Gooey Caramel, you’d think they’re normal, unless they had three of them. But if another person had areolas the size of the other Chips Ahoy! Chewy Gooey cookie varieties, you’d want them to put their shirt back on.

At first, I didn’t think the cookies were at all gooey, much like the other Gooey varieties, but it turns out they were. I just didn’t eat them properly. Instead of eating them like any normal human being would, I had to split the cookie in half in order to experience the gooeyness, exactly like what’s shown on the product’s packaging.

Who the hell would eat these cookies in a way that involves the same motions used to open a newspaper? If you’ve watched Sesame Street, you know the proper way to eat cookies involves grabbing a whole bunch of them, throwing them at your mouth, and allowing most of the cookies to fall to the ground while yelling, “Om nom nom nom!”

Chewy Chips Ahoy Gooey Caramel Closeup

You’d think a Chewy Chips Ahoy! cookie stuffed with gooey caramel would be awesome, like watching kittens yawn, but I can’t say that it is.

Each cookie is impregnated with a good amount of caramel, but the caramel flavor is lacking. It’s almost as if I’m eating regular Chewy Chips Ahoy! cookies, which isn’t bad, but there should’ve been more to it. If these cookies had emotions, I would buy a Twix candy bar, eat it in front of them, and then tell the cookies that’s how caramel should taste with cookies and chocolate.

I looked through the ingredients list and found most of the stuff needed to make caramel, but the list didn’t specifically say there’s caramel. It specifically says there are semisweet chocolate chips and lists its ingredients in between sad and happy emoticon mouths, but it doesn’t do the same for the caramel. I thought that was a bit strange.

Overall, the Chewy Chips Ahoy! Gooey Caramel cookies are disappointing. While they’re decent cookies and have a nice chewiness to them, I can’t say they’re addictive, which I think is a pretty good measurement of how good a cookie is. They don’t make me want to eat them faster than Law & Order can rip a story from the headlines.

(Nutrition Facts – 2 cookies – 140 calories, 45 calories from fat, 5 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 1.5 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 125 milligrams of sodium, 50 milligrams of potassium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 12 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.)

Item: Nabisco Chewy Chips Ahoy! Gooey Caramel Cookies
Price: $2.98
Size: 10 ounces
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 5 out of 10
Pros: Gooey, if you eat them a certain way. Chewy. Twix. Lots of caramel. Om nom nom nom! Watching kittens yawn.
Cons: Disappointing. Lacks good caramel flavor. Smaller than other Chewy Gooey Chips Ahoy! varieties. Not addictive. The wasteful way I eat cookies.

REVIEW: Nabisco Chips Ahoy! Chewy Gooey Cookies (Chocofudge and Megafudge)

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Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey Chocofudge

Chips Ahoy cookies are like the human drug testing subjects of the cookie world because Nabisco will stick anything into them to see if it works. Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups…yup. Heath Candy Bar pieces…yup. Candy coated chocolate pieces…yup. Oatmeal…yup. Patriotism…yup.

This time around they’re putting fudge into the center of their signature chocolate chip cookies to create Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey Chocofudge and Megafudge cookies. Yes, the fudge puts the “gooey” in the Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey. Yes, Chocofudge and Megafudge sound like Godzilla’s gigantic blob-like neighbors on Monster Island. And, yes, I wish one of them was named Superfudge so that, much like Nabisco stuffs fudge into these cookies, I could stuff this review with Judy Blume references.

The Chocofudge version looks like a regular Chewy Chips Ahoy cookie, while the Megafudge looks like a Chips Ahoy cookie from a bizarro dimension with its chocolate cookie and white chocolate chips. Although, due to the fudge injection, both varieties look a little more plump than regular Chewy Chips Ahoy.

Fudge fills each cookie like a Great Dane fills a Smart Car. With the amount of fudge it’s almost impossible to not get fudge in every bite, unless you’re one of those odd people who nibbles a cookie like a bunny rabbit nibbles on a carrot.

Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey Megafudge

The Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey cookies are chewy, but I’m not completely sold on the gooey part. In my mind I’ve always imagined gooey being something soft and sticky that holds together as if their lives depended on it as it’s being stretched apart and only separating because gravity demanded it. Although, I may have this mindset from watching way too many pizza commercials. There is some stretching, but the fudge gives up easily, much like I do when playing Madden at All-Madden difficulty. But the fudge doesn’t cry, throw a controller across the room, and scream “I suuuuuck.”

While they aren’t gooey in my eyes, the Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey Chocofudge are really good and a step above regular Chewy Chips Ahoy. Heck, let me say they’re also better than regular non-chewy Chips Ahoy. The fudge, while not quality stuff, does give the cookie a significantly stronger chocolate flavor which makes these cookies much more satisfying than regular Chips Ahoy.

Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey Cookies

As for the Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey Megafudge, I can’t say I enjoyed them as much as the Chocofudge. And I blame the white chocolate chips for that. The chocolate cookie and fudge give it a deep chocolate flavor, but the white chocolate chips disrupt it. They’re like those people who ruin the telling of a really good story by interrupting the storyteller at the most interesting moments with meaningless comments and questions, like “What happened next?” or “If that was me, I’d slap that bitch.”

What happened next? If you shut up, you’ll find out.

I’m glad Nabisco decided to stuff fudge into these Chips Ahoy Chewy Gooey cookies instead of dipping them in fudge like they do with their Oreo cookies, because having fudge on the outside tends to get a little messy. Although, since Chips Ahoy are like the human drug testing subjects of the cookie world, I wouldn’t be surprised if a fudge filled and fudge dipped Chips Ahoy cookie popped up on store shelves.

(Nutrition Facts – 2 cookies – Chocofudge – 150 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 1 gram of polyunsaturated fat, 2 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 110 milligrams of sodium, 60 milligrams of potassium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 13 grams of sugar, and 1 grams of protein. Megafudge – 150 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 1 gram of polyunsaturated fat, 2 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 110 milligrams of sodium, 80 milligrams of potassium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 13 grams of sugar, and 1 grams of protein)

Item: Nabisco Chips Ahoy! Chewy Gooey Cookies (Chocofudge and Megafudge)
Price: $3.99 each
Size: 10 ounces
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 8 out of 10 (Chocofudge)
Rating: 6 out of 10 (Megafudge)
Pros: Chocofudge is a better Chips Ahoy cookie. Enough fudge to have fudge in every bite. Strong chocolate flavor. Not using an exclamation point after EVERY Chips Ahoy reference. Judy Blume.
Cons: Not as gooey as I hoped. White chocolate chips throw off flavor of Megafudge. People who interrupt storytellers. Playing Madden at All-Madden level.

REVIEW: Chips Ahoy! American Summer

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Chips Ahoy American Summer

When I bought the Chips Ahoy! American Summer cookies, I thought I was about to get my America on. But, my raging patriotism turned into dismay when I found out the cookies were made in Mexico.

Mexico? Really?

If your name has America in it, you better be made in America, just like Los Angeles-born actress America Ferrera. If these cookies wanted to truly be American, they should’ve been made in the good ol’ U-S-of-A…or where many American products are made — in China. Now some of you might be preparing blog comments in your head that include the words, “Mexico is in North AMERICA,” but that’s not the America I’m talking about, I’m talking about the good ol’ Red, White, and Blue, and not the good ol’…whatever colors make up the Mexican flag.

And…I just lost the four TIB readers that live in Mexico. You’re next, the two readers in South Korea.

On the Chips Ahoy! American Summer packaging, it says it’s “Crammed with Joy,” but it’s really chocolate chips; red, white, and blue candy coated fudge pieces; and disappointment crammed into a cookie that’s the same size as the regular version.

Chips Ahoy American Summer Naked

My displeasure with these cookies stem from the fact that they don’t taste any different from regular non-patriotic Chips Ahoy!

(See Nabisco. The previous sentence is why you shouldn’t use an exclamation point in your product’s name. People will see that exclamation point and think I’m really mad about Chips Ahoy! American Summer tasting like the regular version, but I only feel a little gypped.)

If you were to blindfold me with an American flag or blind me with the light from 50 stars, then tie my arms together using 13 stripes, and then have the ghost of Betsy Ross feed me Chips Ahoy! American Summer and regular Chips Ahoy! cookies using her sewing needles, the only way I could tell which is which is by the crunch of the candy coated fudge pieces, which is different from the crunch of the cookie. But, those two crunches combined with the rudeness of chewing with my mouth open, makes my maw sound like there are Fourth of July fireworks going on in there.

Yeah, that last sentence was a bit of a stretch, but I’m trying to make these cookies sound more American than they truly are. Because if you think about it, the red, white, and blue candy pieces could easily confuse people into thinking these cookies are Chips Ahoy! French Summer, Chips Ahoy! North Korea Summer, Chips Ahoy! Serbia and Montenegro Summer, or Chips Ahoy! Faroe Islands Summer.

Again, with these Chips Ahoy! American Summer cookies, you’re just eating something that tastes like regular Chips Ahoy! chocolate chip cookies. There really isn’t anything really spectacular about them. But, if you’re having a huge Fourth of July barbeque with excessive red, white, blue themed items, like napkins, plates, cups, balloons, types of tortilla chips, and inflatable outdoor playground bouncers, then Chips Ahoy! American Summer is perfect for you.

(Nutrition Facts – 3 cookies – 160 calories, 60 calories from fat, 7 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat*, 2.5 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 1.5 grams of monounsaturated fat, 110 milligrams of sodium, 40 milligrams of potassium, 23 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 11 grams of sugar, 1 gram of protein, and 6% iron.)

*uses partially hydrogenated oils

Item: Chips Ahoy! American Summer
Price: $3.99 (on sale)
Size: 12.2 ounces
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 5 out of 10
Pros: Resealable packaging. Contains poly- and monounsaturated fats. Fourth of July barbeques. Outdoor playground bouncers.
Cons: Tastes like regular Chips Ahoy! Nothing spectacular about them. Could easily be confused as Chips Ahoy! Serbia and Montenegro Summer cookies. Chips Ahoy! having an exclamation point in its name.

REVIEW: Chips Ahoy! Made With Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups

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Combining Chips Ahoy! chocolate chips cookies with Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups sounds like the kind of trickery that only magical asexual elves living in the Hollow Tree Factory could come up with. But, of course, due to patents and trademarks owned by Nabisco, the magical asexual elves who get off on baking packaged treats, instead of woodland creatures, couldn’t have made the Chips Ahoy! Made With Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups cookies.

Through my decades of eating Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups, I know fusing peanut butter with chocolate makes an excellent combination, much like bringing together five crazy bitches from New Jersey makes for an entertaining train wreck on The Real Housewives of New Jersey. But merging that awesome combination of peanut butter and chocolate with the equally awesome Chips Ahoy! cookie has the potential to be mind-blowing and belt-busting.

But mostly belt-busting.

The merging of the two makes sense, much like a dinner between the women from The Real Housewives of New Jersey and the cast from The Real Housewives of Atlanta makes sense for the Bravo Network. It would be the Big Bang of Bitchiness, and I believe ratings would go through the roof because hair weaves would be pulled out left and right, police officers would get involved and profanity would be spewed out as verbs, nouns, adjectives and pronouns.

While the Chips Ahoy! Made With Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups cookies don’t make me want to pull out someone’s hair extensions, they do make me want to spurt out profanity in the form of verbs, nouns, adjectives, and pronouns. However, I would be cursing with delight and a smile on my face, and not in anger with crazy eyes, because the Chips Ahoy! Made With Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups are the muthafuckin’ shit.

Actually, let me take that back. Not the profanity, but how much I enjoyed these cookies.

I’m downgrading how much of the shit it is because it’s hard to detect the unique flavor of the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup’s peanut butter in the cookie. There’s definitely a pleasant peanut butter flavor, which is nicely balanced with the chocolate and the rest of the crunchy cookie, but it’s not what I expected. I can see chunks of peanut butter cups in each cookie, but it’s hard for me to believe they’re actual pieces of Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups.

Thankfully there’s an ingredients list, which tells me that there are actual Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup pieces. But it’s near the bottom of the list, which tells me there isn’t much. However, there are other ingredients ahead of it on the list that relate to peanut butter cups: peanut butter baking cups, peanut flavored chips, and something called Reese’s Peanut Butter Drops. Since there are more of these ingredients, they might be the cause of the cookie’s unexpected flavor.

Although I’m disappointed Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups aren’t noticeable in the cookies, I do think they’re really good. They’ve got the same crunch as regular Chips Ahoy! cookies and are also hard to put down. While I don’t think they’re the muthafuckin’ shit, I do think they are the shit.

(Nutrition Facts – 2 cookies – 160 calories, 9 grams of fat, 4.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat*, 0.5 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 3 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 85 milligrams of sodium, 35 milligrams of potassium, 18 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of dietary fiber, 9 grams of sugar, 2 grams of protein and 4% iron.)

*may contain less than 0.5 grams of trans fat due to use of partially hydrogenated oils

(NOTE: Thanks to TIB reader Alex for letting us know about these cookies.)

Item: Chips Ahoy! Made With Reese’s Peanut Butter Cups
Price: $3.00 (on sale)
Size: 9.5 ounces
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 8 out of 10
Pros: It is the shit. Really good. Nice balance of chocolate and peanut butter. Crunchy like regular Chips Ahoy! Being able to use profanity as verbs, nouns, adjectives and pronouns.
Cons: The unique flavor of the Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup isn’t noticeable. Getting caught in the middle of a fight between the casts of Real Housewives shows. Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup pieces is listed near the bottom of the ingredients list. Getting hair weaves pulled out. Not the muthafuckin’ shit.

REVIEW: Limited Edition Chips Ahoy! Fudge Bites

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Limited Edition Chips Ahoy! Fudge Bites

Seriously, the Limited Edition Chips Ahoy! Fudge Bites was the best idea that came out of some brainstorming meeting at Nabisco to come up with new cookies. That must have been one short meeting because it looks like a product that took five seconds to come up with.

For a limited edition cookie, it’s really unimaginative, because it just looks like a Hershey’s Kiss fell on top of a small Chips Ahoy! cookie and melted. It also sort of looks like two frogs mating, but that might just be me. Heck, I thought the easy opening resealable packaging was more exciting than the cookie itself. I think a roomful of college-aged stoners with a bunch of cookies, candies and other snacks could’ve come up with at least ten good cookie ideas by the time the weed was gone, unless they got distracted by episodes of Wow! Wow! Wubbzy!

The cookie used for these Fudge Bites are significantly smaller than regular Chips Ahoy! and measure about 1.5 inches in diameter, but I guess if they were bigger, they couldn’t be called “bites.” The fudge is place smack dab in the middle of the cookie in an indentation. If you want to make a monster out of cookies, you would probably use these as its eyes. Or you can use them as its nipples.

I feel sorry for the chocolate chips in the cookie because they seem unnecessary thanks to the fudge, which overwhelms them. The fudge isn’t of a high quality, but it does give the crunchy cookie a really strong chocolate taste. With the fudge being as big as it is, it ensures there will be fudge in every bite. But then again they’re small enough that most of you could easily fit an entire cookie in your mouth without the need for opening your jaw like you’re deep throating a banana.

The Chips Ahoy! Fudge Bites are good, but they should be for an easily conceived concept that combines two things people love and doesn’t take much risk. They’re limited edition and I’m fine with that, because I don’t think I’ll miss them when they’re gone. Although it will be hard to find a replacement for my cookie monster’s eyes and nipples.

(Nutrition Facts – 4 cookies – 170 calories, 8 grams of fat, 4 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 2 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 1 gram of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 110 milligrams of sodium, 45 milligrams of potassium, 22 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 11 grams of sugar, 2 grams of protein and 6% iron.)

Item: Limited Edition Chips Ahoy! Fudge Bites
Price: $3.50 (on sale)
Size: 10.2 ounces
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Good, but they should be! Fudge in every bite! Resealable packaging! Small enough to stick a whole cookie in my mouth! Making a monster out of cookies!
Cons: Not an imaginative idea! Chocolate chips were meaningless thanks to the fudge! Smaller than regular Chips Ahoy! Having to put an exclamation point after Chips Ahoy!

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