REVIEW: Pop-Tarts Cereal

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Pop Tarts Cereal

Breakfast may widely be considered the most important meal of the day, but I’ve always found it difficult to muster an appetite for much before noon. As a kid, this bothered my mother to no end, and she was always trying to find something, anything, that I would be willing to eat before sending me off on the school bus.

After offering me granola bars, yogurt, and every other remotely wholesome breakfast food known to mom-kind, she found I was always happy to eat a couple of warm Pop-Tarts, no matter how early it was.

Although Kellogg’s new Pop-Tart cereals may have arrived too late to expand my morning meal repertoire, they offer two bowl-bound alternatives to the popular foil-wrapped toaster pastries, and promise, according to the boxes, to pack delicious filling into every bite.

Strawberry

Pop Tarts Strawberry Cereal

With a strong strawberry aroma and thin glaze of icing encasing each piece, I had my hopes set pretty high on this flavor. Unfortunately, just like the kids who opened presents on Christmas Day to find packages of socks and underwear, my expectations were quickly dashed.

Although the cereal smells like the toaster tart it was modeled after, it tastes much blander. Most of what I noticed at first was the “crust” of each square, which seemed very similar to the pastry dough of a strawberry Pop-Tart. While I’ll give Kellogg’s props for consistency, it makes for a very bland and unexciting cereal.

Pop Tarts Strawberry Cereal Innards

The much-touted “delicious filling” also turned out to be a much ado about nothing. The cereal pieces have so little of it in them that they appear visibly hollow when you bite one in half. Worse yet, the little amount of filling is hardly delicious, and gives the cereal a strange sort of off-putting chewiness, especially after it’s been soaking in milk for a few minutes.

Purchased Price: $3.64
Size: 17 oz. box
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 cup) 150 calories, 1 gram of total fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 180 milligrams of sodium, 35 grams of total carbohydrates, 3 grams of dietary fiber, 16 grams of total sugars, 16 grams of added sugars, and 2 grams of protein.

Brown Sugar Cinnamon

In comparison to the strawberry version’s strong first impression, I could tell there was something off about this flavor as soon as I opened the bag. Rather than reminding me of the toaster pastry of my youth, this cereal instead had an unusually strong artificial maple scent, and the squares themselves appeared plain and unappetizing.

Pop Tarts Brown Sugar Cinnamon Cereal

My dismay regarding this cereal’s look and smell was entirely justified, too, since it tastes nothing like the Pop-Tart it was named for. Like with the strawberry version, all of the cereal squares were in desperate need of both more filling and more flavor, and the dusting of frosting on each piece was quickly lost in my bowl of milk.

Purchased Price: $3.64
Size: 17 oz. box
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 3 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 cup) 150 calories, 1 gram of total fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 180 milligrams of sodium, 35 grams of total carbohydrates, 3 grams of dietary fiber, 15 grams of total sugars, 15 grams of added sugars, and 2 grams of protein..

Other Things:

  • Three cups of Pop-Tarts cereal have roughly as many calories as a foil package of standard Pop-Tarts, so both of these are good examples of the common trade-off between quantity and quality.
  • Both boxes make a big deal about how having sprinkles supposedly makes eating a bowl of cereal more fun, but the sprinkles here so small you almost need a magnifying glass to see them.

REVIEW: Fruity Lucky Charms Cereal

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Fruity Lucky Charms Cereal

Lucky the Leprechaun is having an identity crisis. First, he thought he was Tony the Tiger with Lucky Charms Frosted Flakes, and now he thinks he’s a Flintstone with the new Fruity Lucky Charms. I hope he figures it out soon before we see a version with two scoops of raisins.

Fruity Lucky Charms Cereal w Fruity Pebbles

On the bright side, this new iteration isn’t just the original dyed pink. Instead of frosted toasted oat cereal, it’s sweetened corn cereal which tastes quite different. The former tastes boring and oat-y (see: Cheerios) but with pops of sweet marshmallows as a reprieve. No wonder I tried picking out just the marshmallows as a kid! The latter is definitely sweeter and more Fruity Pebbles-like, but not as sweet or as abrasive to the roof of your mouth. And although it’s made of corn instead of oat, the shape and texture stay true to form.

Fruity Lucky Charms Cereal in the Bag

On the not-so-bright side, the pinky orangey bits of sweetened corn are overpowering. You can only taste the nondescript fruits that make up whatever “fruity” is supposed to be. To make matters a touch worse, there is also an equally nondescript bitter aftertaste.

Fruity Lucky Charms Cereal in Milk

The taste experience goes from a fruity sweetness to a slight sourness, which makes your glands salivate like eating a pleasant sour candy, but it resolves into a bitterness. It’s not an awful bitterness that made me stop eating though. If you spoon quickly enough, you can keep your taste buds tricked with continued hits of initial sweetness.

Fruity Lucky Charms Cereal Marbit Brightness

Unfortunately, because of the overpowering flavor, the marshmallows get completely lost and are just a texture add-in. Speaking of the marshmallows, it’s surprising to see these bits were brighter than in the original ones. I suppose that makes sense because you don’t want the ‘mallows to look washed out against the neon.

Fruity Lucky Charms Cereal No Millenial Milk

I was a bit disappointed it didn’t turn my milk millennial pink though. Given how vibrant the marshmallows and cereal were, I was hoping for some food magic. But, OG Charms don’t really do that either, so I guess I should’ve had more realistic expectations! I ultimately prefer it sans milk though, like most of my other cereal consumption. The flavor seems about the same when eaten with milk and eaten dry. Yes, bitterness and all.

Despite the weird aftertaste, I still think Fruity Lucky Charms are magically delicious. Yes, even this version of the identity crisis.

Purchased Price: $3.64
Size: 21.2 oz. box (Family Size)
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (3/4 cup without milk) – 100 calories, 10 calories from fat, 1 gram of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 150 milligrams of sodium, 50 milligrams of potassium, 23 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 10 grams of sugar, 13 grams of other carbohydrates, and 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Sour Patch Kids Cereal

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Sour Patch Kids Cereal

I’m calling it now.

2019 is The Year of the Cereal!

But not just any cereal, the crazy mashup or off the wall flavors that will hopefully debut to push aside the bajillionth Oreo flavor. We are off to a good start with one of the wackiest debuts in a while. Who knew the candy you sometimes get at the movie theater and when you do you end up eating very slowly so as not to get a mouth ulcer (true story!) would be the way to start your day off right?

As I break open the bag of Sour Patch Kids Cereal, I get a whiff of fruitiness very similar to the other many fruity breakfast cereals – Fruity Pebbles, Trix, Froot Loops, etc. However, there is that tinge of sour that’s always present in sour candy. They do smell like Sour Patch Kids. I can feel my lips puckering already!

Sour Patch Kids Cereal 2

There are five colors (blue, green, orange, yellow, and red) that appear subdued a bit as the pieces all have a whitish powdery coating. The shape is close enough to the candy that it works although they are smaller and skinnier and the tops of their heads sometimes skew more towards pointy than rounded. Here’s what they look like in a friendlier breakfast type of way – the kids of Count Chocula while they are still sleeping.

Sour Patch Kids Cereal 3

I take a heaping handful and chomp down on the colorful corpses. The sour comes in strong right out of the gate but fades quickly as it seems to be powder based and certainly not as strong as the large granules on the real thing. Post nailed the intensity as it is just right. Any more would have been pretty off-putting, and any less would have made the whole concept pointless.

However, after it wears off, these devolve to (Insert here any generic fruity cereal). In a gummy shell, these taste like slightly sour fruit loops. As with Froot Loops, the colors all taste the same as each one is a fruity mix of flavors.

Sour Patch Kids Cereal 4

I inhaled a good number of handfuls of these before having the kids take a trip to the milky swimming pool. I wasn’t really shocked to find out that the milk washes away nearly all of the sour powder. With the coating gone, the sweetness of the pieces gets heightened. What did shock me was that the dairy at the end had no sourness whatsoever. It was like a magic trick. Sourness? Poof! Gone with a spoonful of milk. They did stay crunchy, though.

Sour Patch Kids slogan is “Sour. Sweet. Gone.” For this cereal, it should be “Slightly sour. A little too sweet. Kinda feel nauseous now.” This isn’t going to become a staple in your pantry anytime soon, but it sure is a fun novelty that I hope opens the door to more.

Long live The Year of the Cereal!

Purchased Price: $3.89
Size: 10 oz. box
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 cup) 140 calories, 3 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 210 milligrams of sodium, 25 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 13 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Maple Cheerios Cereal

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Maple Cheerios Cereal

Well, all the pumpkin stuff is out, so that can mean only one thing – it’s also maple season!

Now I don’t know if fall necessarily makes people think “maple syrup” but brands sure like to load the shelves with maple flavor variants around this time of year, and I’m certainly not complaining.

I’m particularly excited about one brand’s (American) foray into the maple realm – Cheerios.

Cheerios has been knocking it out of the park lately with new flavors. In the past year, I’ve enjoyed its takes on

There’s a nice waft of maple scent when you open the box, but the cereal pieces themselves aren’t flashy. They look like a standard bowl of Honey Nut Cheerios.

Maple Cheerios Cereal 2

I ate a quick handful of dry Maple Cheerios before pouring in the milk to get a true idea of the taste. The amount of flavor is on par with the aforementioned flavors you’ve probably already had. Cheerios never really overpower you with too much sweetness. I enjoy that because it gives me a sense that I’m eating healthy. Well, healthier.

After I added milk, the cereal lost some of its luster. Honestly, they kinda tasted like Honey Nut Cheerios, which is an all-time classic cereal, but I imagine that news may be disappointing to some. Don’t be too bummed, as there’s still a maple finish, so it’s not exactly like Honey Nut.

Maple Cheerios Cereal 3

One other thing I noticed was that despite not being “waffle” flavored, there’s almost a buttery essence as they sog in the milk. It was really nice. If you’re expecting these to be the new “Waffle Crisp” or “French Toast Crunch,” that’s not what you’re gonna get, but I will say this is like a snooty grownup version of those confectionary classics.

While there isn’t a maple explosion, fans of Honey Nut Cheerios should find this a satisfying bowl of cereal. The leftover milk was pleasantly maple flavored and somehow a lot sweeter than the cereal itself. It was a little too sweet for me if I had to find fault.

Maple Cheerios Cereal 4

You can eat these plain or in milk, and you’ll more than likely enjoy them either way. You can also do what I do and cover a banana in peanut butter, then sprinkle Cheerios on top™. I find this to be a great pre-gym snack. I actually sold the recipe to Blue Apron. I’m pretty sure Food and Wine Magazine named it the “Best New Recipe” of 2014.

So yeah, Maple Cheerios is another great flavor in its lineup. I hope it keeps the product line rolling. Gimmie some coconut Cheerios. How about something crazy like pineapple? How about going nuts and combining them for a Pina Colada type flavor? I’m excited to see what’s next.

(Nutrition Facts – 3/4 cup – 110 calories, 1.5 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 125 milligrams of sodium, 120 milligrams of potassium, 22 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 9 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $2.50
Size: 10.8 oz. box
Purchased at: Wegmans
Rating: 8 out of 10
Pros: Another winning flavor for Cheerios. Tasted like Honey Nut. Good dry or in milk. Tastes great on a peanut butter covered banana! Game on the back of the box.
Cons: Perhaps a little light on the Maple flavor. Milk runoff somehow too sweet. Canada’s apparently had this flavor for a while. Summer’s over. I lied – Blue Apron sent me a cease and desist.

QUICK REVIEW: Limited Edition Chocolatey Winter Lucky Charms Cereal

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Limited Edition Chocolatey Winter Lucky Charms Cereal

What is it?

General Mills has launched a new festive cereal just in time for the holidays.

Except that it isn’t new. Chocolatey Winter Lucky Charms is just regular Chocolate Lucky Charms with the marshmallows from last year’s Cinnamon Vanilla version.

How is it?

Limited Edition Chocolatey Winter Lucky Charms Cereal 2

Limited Edition Chocolatey Winter Lucky Charms Cereal 3

I am disappointed that this cereal is so unoriginal. But I’m not that disappointed, because Chocolate Lucky Charms is great, and I would even say it’s better than the original. It’s OK dry, but it creates chocolate milk, which makes consumption delightful.

Limited Edition Chocolatey Winter Lucky Charms Cereal 6

I wonder if this cereal is an attempt to be a hot cocoa flavor, since it already has the essential elements of chocolate and marshmallow. So I heated up some milk and ate it in a mug. The marshmallows became foamy and dissolved, just like the marshmallows in a packet of Swiss Miss. It takes a lot of cereal to make the milk chocolatey, but this would be a comforting breakfast or snack when it’s actually cold outside (i.e. not September).

Is there anything else I need to know?

Limited Edition Chocolatey Winter Lucky Charms Cereal 4

This cereal contains my biggest yuletide pet peeve: eight-pointed snowflakes. Snowflakes only have six points, people! It’s basic science!

Limited Edition Chocolatey Winter Lucky Charms Cereal 5

Scientific inaccuracy aside, I cannot possibly think of anything more appropriate for someone to eat while watching The Leprechauns’ Christmas Gold.

Conclusion:

If you’re looking for something new, this isn’t what you want. But it’s a fun tweak to a classic cereal.

Purchased Price: $3.64
Size: 21.2 oz. box
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (3/4 cup) 100 calories, 10 calories from fat, 1 gram of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 grams of polyunsaturated fat, 0.5 grams of monounsaturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 150 milligrams of sodium, 65 milligrams of potassium, 23 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of dietary fiber, 10 grams of sugar, 12 grams of other carbohydrates, and 1 gram of protein.

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