No one will ever be able to accuse Arby’s of not trying. While other fast food companies are content with slapping an extra slice of cheese on an existing product and calling it The Cheesasaurus Rex, or maybe “smoking” their bacon with some new exotic wood, Arby’s is out here swinging for the fences.

In 2016, it gave people the (extremely) limited edition venison sandwich with juniper berry sauce. The year after that, it offered an elk sandwich with blackberry port sauce. Or take, for instance, The Meat Mountain, a veritable Noah’s Ark of the drive-thru that features chicken tenders, ham, turkey, pastrami, roast beef, and bacon. (Oh, and some cheese, too.)

This brings us to the present day and Arby’s new Real Country Style Rib Sandwich. Is this offering a direct competitor to McDonald’s cult-favorite McRib, which also, incidentally, has its (mostly) annual re-release in the Fall? Did we exit the dark days of the Chicken Sandwich Wars only to find ourselves immediately entrenched in a Rib Sandwich Skirmish? A Rib Conflict? A Ribflict?

Well, not exactly.

See, Arby’s approach is a little more highbrow. Instead of processed pig parts of mysterious origin, its “real” ribs are sourced from Sadler’s, a Texas-based smokehouse. The ribs are smoked for eight hours “over real hickory wood.” The sandwich is then topped with melted Gouda, crispy onions, BBQ sauce, and mayo. Ooh-la-la, right? And so how is it?

Well, let’s start with the ribs. Look, I live in Kansas City, so, you know, BBQ and so forth. And here’s the deal with these ribs: they are shockingly not bad. I was surprised at how tender and flavorful the meat was; they even had a distinctly authentic smoke flavor. It was a sizable serving as well. Simply put, the ribs were easily the highlight of the sandwich.

But what about the other components?

The Gouda was creamy and melty, and added its own bit of welcomed smokiness. Sadly, the rest of the sandwich fell sort of flat. The mayo was… there? For some reason? And, while the idea of fried onion pieces was a good one, the execution was lacking; drowning in a sea of BBQ sauce and mayo, they had no chance at staying crunchy. Instead, they became soft globules of chewy onion.

And then you’ve got this BBQ sauce. Oy. This stuff.

It tasted like expired Bull’s-Eye brand sauce, or off-kilter ketchup, or maybe like aliens descended to Earth, and you explained what BBQ sauce is, and they tried to make it from scratch using ingredients foraged from a dumpster behind The Dollar Tree. It was awful, and there was a LAKE of the stuff on this sandwich, making the whole thing a gigantic, sloppy mess.

But, okay, awfulsauce aside, this thing is worth an order, at least to experience the ribs. But my suggestion would be to tell them to hold the BBQ sauce and then apply your own at home. Otherwise, you’ll be sorry.

Purchased Price: $5.99
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 500 calories, 23 grams of fat, 7 grams of saturated fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 70 milligrams of cholesterol, 1450 milligrams of sodium, 48 grams of carbohydrates, 3 gram of dietary fiber, 12 grams of sugar, and 28 grams of protein.

Until I sat down to write this and started Googling for background info, I had absolutely no idea that Arby’s — noted proprietor of meat — didn’t have chicken nuggets on its menu. Maybe it’s because I’ve seen the chicken tenders and just assumed it also served poultry in a more nuggeted form; maybe it’s because when traveling to the land of curly fries and Beef’n Cheddar, who feels it necessary to order nuggets?

I never had before, and, in case you don’t feel like reading a full review of Arby’s new Premium Chicken Nuggets, I probably won’t again. That isn’t to say they are appalling or abhorrently bad; they’re just… boring.

Arby’s touts its new offering as having “100% chicken breast,” which seems legit and is pretty par for the course, I guess. It’s offering them in Arby’s kids’ meals (as a 4 or a 6 piece) and as a 9-piece solo meal or as part of its “2 for $6” promotion, which also includes the Classic Roast Beef and the Classic Beef’n Cheddar. And while $3 for 9 nuggs is a reasonable deal in today’s market (Maybe? To be fair, I haven’t comparative nugget priced in a while.), you’d be better served doubling up on the B&C, honestly.

The thing about these is that there is nothing special about them. The seasoning is bland (and by “bland,” I mean “non-existent”) and the nuggets themselves are drier than a mummy’s tongue. These things are no different than frozen nuggets that come from a truck that maybe you’d find at a neighborhood swimming pool or waterpark snack bar. Fresh from the fryer (and these were), they are hot and salty.

Additionally, they are decently sized. Unlike McDonald’s or Wendy’s uniformly sized nuggets, these are all like snowflakes, like the kind you’d get at, oh, say, Chick-fil-A. The smallest piece was the size of two Hershey’s Kisses mushed-up together, and the biggest was the size and shape of an obese walnut. If you’re getting them for $3 as part of the promotion, it’s a reasonable deal; if, however, you’re getting them in the meal or as a solo item ($3.99), you’re moving out of the “good deal” territory.

Anyway, if you’re looking for a perfectly acceptable sauce delivery vehicle, these will do. You know, like almost any other nugget. If, however, you want a nugget that can headline based on the strength of its own merit, this isn’t the one for you. Arby’s would do well to stick with the RB and leave the chicken to those who typically traffic in bird.

Purchased Price: $3.99
Size: 9-pieces
Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (9 nuggets) 470 calories, 23 grams of fat, 7 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat,75 milligrams of cholesterol, 1360 milligrams of sodium, 28 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 2 grams of sugar, and 38 grams of protein.

What are Arby’s Crinkle Cut Fries?

Arby’s new permanent fries are exactly as they sound — an “…accordion-style” deep-fried spud offering! The website touts the “…groves for maximum crispiness, lightly seasoned with fine kosher salt.”

(Editor’s Note: I’m pretty sure “groves” is supposed to be “grooves.” But that’s really how it’s spelled on Arby’s website. I added the screenshot below for proof.)

How are they?

Crinkle cut fries are near and dear to my heart. They remind me of elementary school lunches when the best part of my day was lunchtime. These were exactly like a blast from the past – limp, slightly undercooked, but decently salted.

Anything else you need to know?

I tested these head-to-head with crinkle cut fries from the grocery store. The air fried Ore-Ida ones I made were better. They were golden brown and actually had more crispness.

Unfortunately, Arby’s is pretty serious about its mediocre crinkle cut fry offering. The fast food chain even made a TV commercial for it!

Conclusion:

I ate every single one of those limp, slightly undercooked, but decently salted fries, but they’re not better than frozen crinkle cut fries found at your local grocery store.

Maybe one day Arby’s will offer a mixed spuds basket with its curlies, crinkle, and cakes – kind of like mixing all the sodas together. But I wouldn’t get the crinkle fries on their own. I’ll stick with the curlies!

Purchased Price: $2.49
Size: Medium
Rating: 4 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (Medium) 530 calories, 26 grams of fat, 4 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 630 milligrams of sodium, 68 grams of carbohydrates, 0 gram of dietary fiber, 0 grams of sugar, and 7 grams of protein.

What is Arby’s Fish ‘N Cheddar Sandwich?

“WE HAVE THE FISH,” declares Arby’s new Fish ‘N Cheddar Sandwich wrapper.

I guess it does because Arby’s has THREE limited time fish sandwich options: the Crispy Fish Sandwich (crispy fish, tartar sauce, lettuce, sesame seed bun), Fish N’ Cheddar (crispy fish, cheddar cheese sauce, tartar sauce, lettuce sesame seed bun), and the King’s Hawaiian Fish Deluxe Sandwich (crispy fish, cheddar cheese, tartar sauce, lettuce, tomatoes on a King’s Hawaiian bun).

We’ve seen the Crispy Fish and the King’s Hawaiian Fish Deluxe before, but not the Fish N’ Cheddar. But let’s be real. It’s basically the crispy fish sandwich with cheddar cheese sauce.

Arby’s also boldly declares that the fish lineup is “Hang Off The Bun Huge.” As someone who lived in Indiana and has experienced a Pork Tenderloin sandwich, which is known for the meat outsizing the bun, I can appreciate this.

How is it?

If the meat is going to outsize the bun, it better be dang good. Unfortunately, in this case, the fish wasn’t. The flavor was fine, but the texture was its downfall. To be fair, it wasn’t like a soggy wet nap, but it simply didn’t have that desirable deep-fried crunch.

In my opinion, they were way too fair on the breading-to-fish ratio. I wouldn’t have been upset if Arby’s skimped just a bit to make the breading a smidge more robust to create a delicious, crispy exterior.

Now on to what makes the sandwich “new” — the cheddar cheese sauce. This sauce was basically a less liquid-y nacho cheese. I concluded that even though it provides a more favorable melted texture than a square of American cheese, its flavor doesn’t complement the rest of the sandwich.

Is there anything else you need to know?

I ate this side-by-side with McDonald’s Filet-O-Fish. Arby’s offering was bigger, wasn’t doused in tartar sauce, and contained iceberg lettuce and cheese sauce, but these differences didn’t really give it an edge over the Filet-O-Fish and is not worth the extra couple of bucks.

Conclusion:

I would pick the Filet-O-Fish over this any day. If Arby’s brought back its Nashville Hot Fish Sandwich, I may consider making it my fast food fish fix. But, when it comes to a basic fried fish sandwich, I prefer the McDonald’s classic.

Purchased Price: $4.29
Size: N/A
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 540 calories, 22 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 40 milligrams of cholesterol, 1030 milligrams of sodium, 65 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of fiber, 7 grams of sugar, and 20 grams of protein.

What is the Arby’s King’s Hawaiian Big Kahuna?

Remember when Arby’s first released the Meat Mountain? Piling every one of its meats on a single sandwich, the “secret menu” item was the subject of articles written with equal parts awe and disgust. I saw it as more of a stunt offering than a real menu item, not fit to be ordered by a respectable gentleman of refined taste such as myself. I certainly did not order and consume one late one night from the nearby gas station-attached Arby’s near my house.

I mention the Meat Mountain only to highlight that the Arby’s King’s Hawaiian Big Kahuna sandwich features three types of meat: a fried chicken fillet, ham, and smoked brisket, as well as Swiss cheese, lettuce, tomato, and a pineapple habanero mustard on a sweet Hawaiian roll. It’s a hefty sandwich, and it’s on the regular menu without any particular attention. Truly, the arc of the fast food universe is long, but it bends towards gluttony.

How is it?

The King’s Sweet Hawaiian roll is something Arby’s has returned to again and again for good reason. Its sweetness complements the sandwich without overwhelming any individual element. By itself, it’s noticeably sweet, but that sweetness lessens when eaten as a part of the whole.

The chicken remains crisp even after the drive home, and the ham and Swiss are natural cordon bleu-esque additions. The smoked brisket adds smokiness, but is a bit dry. It seems extraneous to me, but doesn’t subtract from the whole. The pineapple habanero mustard really tastes like sweet pineapple and adds a needed kick to the whole affair. Without it, the sandwich’s sweetness could have been overwhelming.

Is there anything else you need to know?

There’s been a trend in recent years for burgers and sandwiches to be piled so high that they’re too unstable to be actually eaten by hand. I certainly remember the Meat Mountain eroding into a hill of various meats and cheeses, forcing me to pick through them with my fingers in the harsh, judgmental dome light of my car.

The advertising photos of the towering King’s Hawaiian Big Kahuna sandwich made me think I’d be in for a repeat of my shameful late-night mountaineering expedition, but I was pleasantly surprised at the structural integrity of this sandwich. This is one time I was happy the actual product was smaller than advertised. The tomato caused a bit of slippage, but I was able to handle it and get a bit of each element in every bite.

Conclusion:

It’s a sandwich that will satisfy your inner gourmand without being too much. I mean, we’re through the looking glass now with eating contest-sized sandwiches becoming the norm, but I’m not complaining. I look forward to trying Arby’s Meat Continent in a few years.

Purchased Price: $6.99
Size: N/A
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 860 calories, 39 grams of fat, 15 grams of saturated fat, 195 milligrams of cholesterol, 2380 milligrams of sodium, 69 grams of carbohydrates, 4 grams of fiber, 22 grams of sugar, and 60 gram of protein.