REVIEW: Doritos Baja Fiery Mango

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With the introduction of these new Doritos Baja Fiery Mango Tortilla Chips, will we start seeing a new fruity Baja chip flavor every year, similar to how Mtn Dew rolls out new Baja soda varieties annually? That would be a Baja Blast if that happened, PepsiCo.

As you can guess from the name, these are spicy. However, they’re not overly spicy. Well, my mouth didn’t think so because my hands weren’t reaching out for a cool beverage to put out an intolerable burn in my mouth. However, other parts of my body were not in sync with my mouth because certain glands on my head thought otherwise, causing the pores on my forehead and the back of my neck to express their thoughts about the spiciness through perspirat…Whoop! There’s the intolerable heat in my mouth! I’ll be right back. I need something cold to drink.

While the spiciness forced me to get a glass of water, it didn’t make me forget about the slightly off-putting mango flavor when I first started eating them. There was no mistaking it was an artificial mango taste, but there was a saccharine explosion that made things too sweet. Thankfully, the heat rose up and cut through that. After a few more bites, there was a sweet and spicy balance, but every time I gave my taste buds a break, that initial flavor would make its unwanted return. When everything is balanced, the chips have a decent chile artificial mango taste, but it’s not a flavor that I’ll be yearning for.

Before these Doritos, Frito-Lay’s only offerings with mango flavor were potato chips. Both times, they seemed odd and produced varying results to my taste buds, from mediocre to bad. Maybe it’s just me, but fruit and fuego flavors make more sense on a tortilla chip than a potato chip, like with last year’s Doritos Spicy Pineapple Jalapeño.

Much like the previously mentioned fruity spicy Doritos from a year ago, these are okay, but aren’t compelling enough for me to eat again. However, if you liked Doritos Spicy Pineapple Jalapeño, you might enjoy this.

Actually, now I’m truly wondering if I really do want Doritos to offer a new Baja chip flavor every year, like how Mtn Dew rolls out new Baja soda varieties annually.

Purchased Price: More than one should pay on eBay
Size: 9 oz bag
Purchased at: eBay
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (about 11 chips) 150 calories, 7 grams of fat, 1 gram of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 150 milligrams of sodium, 17 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, less than 1 gram of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Doritos Late Night Sizzlin’ Cheeseburger

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It’s possible there are no new chip flavors left — just re-imagined, re-launched, and rekindled love for previously executed flavor blends. Regardless, I was curious enough to see what the latest Doritos had in store for us with its Late Night Sizzlin’ Cheeseburger.

There have been burger-inspired Doritos in the past, including a Late Night All Nighter Cheeseburger flavor. Recent similar flavors have only been available in the UK, like the Whopper collaboration with Doritos last year. After finding a small but steady fan contingency hyped about their return, I was ready to try these out.

They look pretty promising straight out of the bag, covered in a thin but visible layer of orange seasoning and with the distinct aroma of white onion, pickle, and burger char. It smelled like getting into a car driven by someone who recently picked up a fast food cheeseburger, and the car still smells like that burger, but it’s definitely gone now. Shoot.

The flavor is very characteristic of a burger. The strongest flavors are onion, pickle, char flavor, and the occasional hit of cheese or sweetness that makes me think of ketchup. I’ve experienced this flavor combination on other brands and chip types, and it took me a while to decide if the Doritos corn chip is the best-paired base. Ultimately, the crunchy texture adds to the experience, and it is certainly not the worst burger chip I’ve ever eaten. My only qualm is that my mouth tastes like burger burps after one serving. The aftertaste is STRONG. I had to brush my teeth 30 minutes after consuming it because I wanted the old burger to taste out. If you’re into that, maybe it’s a benefit!

Overall, this is a flavor execution classic that Doritos didn’t mess with much. They taste like a cheeseburger, deliver on that false char aftertaste, and ultimately had me craving an actual burger. I wouldn’t repurchase them, but it looks like a lot of you are thrilled about their return. Oh, one other note, the last ingredient on the ingredient line is Beef Fat. I didn’t expect that, and I don’t fully understand what it “adds” to the chip at such a low level, but there’s that.

Purchased Price: $4.49 (on sale)
Size: 9 oz bag
Purchased at: Mariano’s (Kroger)
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (About 11 chips) 150 Calories, 7 grams of fat, 1 gram of saturated fat, 150 milligrams of sodium, 17 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, less than 1 gram of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Burger King Frozen Cotton Candy Cloud

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Am I the only one noticing weird weather in the forecast?

It’s almost May, and my weather app says it’s gonna be ice-cold and cloudy. Not only does it say Wednesday is gonna be, what I can only assume is some kind of crazy weather phenomenon, a “Whopper?” Is that a new meteorology term or—ya know what? This is the Burger King app. I’m in the Burger King app. False alarm, everybody.

We good? Ok!

Burger King has a new Frozen Cotton Candy Cloud that is a perfect treat for my actual weather forecast, which looks quite idyllic. The Cotton Candy Cloud is essentially a slush with Burger King’s answer to a coffee shop “cold foam.”

The base drink here is described as a “blue raspberry cotton candy frozen beverage,” but ignore the “blue raspberry” because I think it only applies to the color. It tastes like cotton candy. I never really even clocked any blue raspberry flavor, so if it’s there, it’s negligible.

The slush has a surprisingly soft cotton candy flavor. I expected it to be a lot more cloying. This might be obscure, but it reminded me of the Cotton Candy Swirl ice pops I got from ice cream trucks as a kid. Anything that reminds me of ice cream trucks of my youth gets an instant bump from me. If I could, I would wallpaper my house with photos of all the old Good Humor offerings.

The slush would be just fine on its own, but it’s the “cloud” that really puts it over the top, which might be an intended pun? I don’t know.

The cloud is vanilla ice cream, but the consistency lands somewhere between a milkshake and a cold foam you’d get from Starbucks or Dunkin’. It was the ideal viscosity to plop on an iced drink like this. Vanilla bled into the cotton candy ice, but the cloud managed to mimic its namesake and just float there until I finally decided to mix it in. Apologies for using the words “viscosity,” “plop,” and “bled.”

The churned-in vanilla turned the drink into an icy cotton candy cream milkshake and made for a delicious dessert to my Crispy Royal Wrap that tasted like a deep-fried eraser.

So, this is a cotton candy slush that is not quite like a cold foam coffee and not quite like a soda float, but somewhere in the middle. I would actually love to try this “cloud” in a soda and a coffee to see if it keeps the form it had with the slush.

Did I get brain freeze? Yes.

Did this turn my tongue a little blue? Yep.

Did it give me stomach problems? Sure did.

But did it fill a void in my life I desperately needed to fill? No. It did not.

It’s good though! I knew it would be when the kid at the drive-thru window told me I made “the right choice.” Who knows better than him?

I played a game in the app (horribly, I might add) and got a “free” medium Cotton Candy Cloud with a $1 purchase. Otherwise, it’s $1.49 for a limited time, which is still a great deal. Grab one on the next beautiful day and enjoy yourself.

Purchased Price: $1.49 in the app (probably considerably more without it)
Size: Medium
Purchased at: Burger King
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 250 calories, 9 grams of fat, 9 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 120 milligrams of sodium, 10 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 42 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Starbucks Spicy Cream Cold Foam

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The barista raised her eyebrow after I placed my order. “Have you….” she paused. “Have you tried the spicy stuff yet?”

I ordered my standard drink (three shots over ice) and added the new Spicy Cream Cold Foam from Starbucks. This order prompted the barista to ask me the question laced with unspoken caution. No doubt people have been trying the drinks and, I’m guessing, disliking them. “No, I’m just curious to try it,” I answered.

The “swicy” (spicy + sweet) trend started in late 2023, but the combination of sweet and spicy is not new. I’ve been enjoying swicy foods such as hot honey and Tajin-dusted fruits for a while. By having the sweet element, it cuts down on the burning aspects that come with most spicy flavors that aren’t an enjoyable sensation to everyone.

Getting the drink, I could see the chili blend (paprika, chili powder, ancho chili powder, and cayenne pepper) in the cold foam. Interestingly, I couldn’t smell it; it smelled like the standard cold foam. My curiosity got the best of me, and I tried the foam on its own. At first, the blend of sweet heat was enjoyable. The creamy sweetness of the cold foam and chili spices gave me that swicy flavor I enjoy. However, a few moments later, things took a bit of a turn.

After the initial taste, I felt an uncomfortable, dry burning in the back of my throat. Even without knowing the exact spice blend at the time, I immediately knew the culprit for my discomfort: cayenne pepper. It had to be cayenne, as the sensation was exactly the same as when I tried the Master Cleanse diet years ago, which involved mixing maple syrup, lemon juice, and cayenne pepper into water.

Giving my drink a swirl, I took a sip to see if the espresso would help mellow the cayenne a bit. At the top of the sip, the addition of the espresso was wonderful. The normally somewhat bitter bean juice was smooth and had a bit of sweetness. The flavors were working so well, only to be ruined by the aftereffect of the cayenne’s dull burn in my throat.

I love seeing Starbucks taking swings with some of its newer drinks, but this wasn’t the home run I had hoped it would be. The flavor was outstanding, but the physical sensation from the cayenne was terribly uncomfortable. It wasn’t until I reached the last few sips that I tapped out. No amount of swirling could stop the settling of spice at the bottom of the drink. I imagine an iced latte might be better suited for the Spicy Cream Cold Foam, but I don’t think potentially being uncomfortable again is worth a second attempt.

Purchased Price: $4.90 (drink + cold foam)
Rating: 4 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: Cold foam nutrition facts are unavailable on Starbucks’ website.

REVIEW: Dr Pepper Creamy Coconut

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I find it very strange that the new Dr Pepper Creamy Coconut comes on the heels of the release of Nestle Coffee mate’s Coconut Lime Dirty Soda Creamer, a product designed to be mixed with Dr Pepper. Why would Nestle Coffee mate agree to develop a product that transforms a regular Dr Pepper into a coconut-flavored one when an actual coconut-flavored Dr Pepper would be hitting shelves soon after?

Like the number of licks it takes to get to the center of a Tootsie Pop and why Oreo puts out a cookies & cream variety, the world may never know.

As someone who has tried the creamer with a Dr Pepper, my taste buds had a good idea of what to expect when tasting the limited edition soda. Not surprisingly, they’re similar. Both have a bold coconut flavor with a mild taste of Dr Pepper. I imagine, for some, the coconut flavoring might be a bit too strong, bringing perhaps sunscreen to the forefront, but I didn’t mind the intensity. And that tropical flavor did have a creamy taste to it. I didn’t love it as much as I did last year’s Strawberries & Cream variety, but I still found it to be enjoyable.

While it had a creamy flavor, I didn’t notice a creamy texture. The only way this soda could have that is if something is added to it, like, I dunno, sweet cream or…Oh, Nestle Coffee mate’s Coconut Lime Dirty Soda Creamer. Well, that answers my question at the beginning of this review, and the world will know. I believe this is what they call “synergy” in business. But would adding the creamer make the soda better? Fortunately, I still had a bottle of the creamer in my fridge, so I could find out.

Combining the two turned a pretty good soda into a great one, and if you plan on buying a 12-pack of this, I’d highly recommend picking up a bottle of the creamer if you can get your hands on one. Adding it made Dr Pepper Creamy Coconut earn the “creamy” in its name. While adding more coconut flavoring made everything more coconutty, I could still taste the underlying Dr Pepper. What I didn’t notice was the lime in the creamer, but I didn’t care because everything else was delicious.

Dr Pepper Creamy Coconut is a tasty summer soda that shouldn’t be missed if coconut calls to you.

NOTE: There’s also zero sugar version.

Purchased Price: More than one should pay on eBay
Size: 12 fl oz cans
Purchased at: eBay
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 can) 150 calories, 0 grams of fat, 55 milligrams of sodium, 40 grams of carbohydrates, 39 grams of sugar (including 39 grams of added sugar), 0 grams of protein, and 41 milligrams of caffeine.

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