REVIEW: Kellogg’s Donut Shop Cereals (Pink Donut and Chocolate Donut)

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Kellogg s Donut Shop Cereal Pink Donut

Pink Panther. Pink Floyd. Pink Shirt. Pinky and the Brain.

What do these things have in common?

Nothing, really. Which is kind of the same relationship Kellogg’s new Donut Shop Pink Donut cereal has with the flavor pink, which, in case you weren’t exactly sure, is not a flavor.

This kind of linguistic oddity would usually bother me to no end. However, in the case of Kellogg’s newest cereal brand, I’m willing to sacrifice reason for excellent taste.

Both the Pink Donut and Chocolate Donut flavors of Donut Shop Cereal work off the same template: roughly Froot Loops-shaped rings with a smooth, slightly glazed coating. Aside from packaging that looks like it came from the Easy Bake Oven section of Toys “R” Us, the first thing I noticed about each flavor was their intense, sweet aroma.

Another blogger has compared the Pink Donut rings to frosted animal crackers, and, for as original as I’d like to be, there’s really no other comparison that captures the taste so accurately. Yet, instead of a somewhat bland wheat biscuit-like base behind it, each ring has a sweet vanilla flavor and that characteristic corn flour and oat aftertaste that makes Cap’n Crunch so iconic.

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This is where things get interesting. A slight fruity flavor on the backend is even more pronounced in milk, creating a strawberryish-flavored end milk that is one of the best I’ve ever tasted. Combined with the glazed vanilla coating, the crunchy Pink Donut tastes distinct from any cereal I’ve ever had, borrowing notes from Sprinkled Donut Cap’n Crunch, Froot Loops, and Vanilla Chex. My only complaint is the sweetness level contrasts sharply with the more savory corn flour and oat base, creating a feeling of snacking lethargy after more than a couple servings.

Kellogg s Donut Shop Cereal Chocolate Donut

Chocolate Donut is a bit more conventional in what it’s trying to match, but no less enjoyable. I hesitate to say it tasted exactly like a chocolate cake donut, but it comes pretty close, right on down to the hyper-sweet, cocoa-glazed mouthfeel. Here, the corn and oat aftertaste is a little more at home. While the chocolate flavor isn’t as distinct as Cocoa Puffs or Double Chocolate Krave, the donut glaze on each ring makes it a more enjoyable cereal to snack on.

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It’s rare for cereal to even remotely taste like the baked goods that inspire them. And while I’ve yet to encounter a true pink donut (as opposed to a donut with just pink icing), Kellogg’s new Donut Shop Cereals capture the essence of donuts thanks to their unique glazed coating. It’s too bad Kellogg’s couldn’t come up with a Bavarian cream filling to stick inside the rings.

(Nutrition Facts – Pink Donut – 32 grams – 140 calories, 3 grams of fat, 1 gram of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 160 milligrams of sodium, 25 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 11 grams of sugar, 2 grams of protein. Chocolate Donut – 32 grams – 130 calories, 3 grams of fat, 0.5 gram of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 150 milligrams of sodium, 25 grams of carbohydrates, 1 grams of fiber, 11 grams of sugar, 2 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $3.98 each
Size: 16 oz. box
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 8 out of 10 (Pink Donut)
Rating: 8 out of 10 (Chocolate Donut)
Pros: Excellent representation of donut glaze on cereal form. Pink donut flavor tastes like frosted animal crackers without the crappy cracker part. Really great end milk. Not a bad flavor to get stuck in the roof of your mouth.
Cons: Sweetness can get overwhelming when eaten dry. Chocolate flavor lacks really deep cocoa flavor. Does not include Bavarian Kreme filling.

REVIEW: Peanut Brrr-ittle M&M’s

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Peanut Brrr ittle M M s

While the weather on this packaging is frightful, Mars has launched a new seasonal M&M’s flavor that they hope you think is delightful.

Just in time for the holidays, Peanut Brrr-ittle M&M’s have popped up on Target shelves. To be honest, I wouldn’t have pegged peanut brittle as a holiday flavor, but my recent internet searches suggest that homemade peanut brittle makes a great Christmas gift. A terrible gift, but a gift nonetheless.

It’s also possible that Mars only chose Peanut Brrr-ittle for the punniness of the name. If that’s the case, I’m glad that Brrr-occoli or Brrr-ussel Sprouts didn’t make it past the testing phase.

Since these M&M’s are a Target exclusive, you’ll have to journey through the holiday labyrinth that is the Target Christmas section. If you can avoid the shattered ornaments on the ground, the unorganized stockings strewn about, and the incessant droning of “Rockin’ Around the Christmas Tree” from a chorus of battery operated gyrating conifers, you’ll land upon the Peanut Brrr-ittle M&M’s nestled between the other holiday varieties.

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Upon opening the bag, I was greeted by what looked like a traditional package of holiday Peanut M&M’s. I did a double take – had I picked up the wrong bag on the shelf? Had there been a horrible error on the M&M’s assembly line? Thankfully not – the smell of these M&M’s is very different from the traditional variety, a strong dark caramel scent that borders on artificiality.

Those same caramel notes come through in the taste, similar to what you’d find between the peanuts in a traditional brittle. While the basic peanut still sits in the center of each candy, the chocolate coating offers the aforementioned caramel flavors with hints of a more roasted flavor, similar to a hazelnut. I found the flavoring to be inconsistently applied across the M&M’s I sampled (read: most of the bag), as some tasted more heavily of the normal peanut interior, and some bordered on an overwhelmingly artificial caramel coffee creamer flavor.

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While I found these M&M’s to have a jarring taste at first, I warmed up to them over time as I got used to the nontraditional flavor. I will say that it’s difficult to eat more than a handful of these at each sitting, as the peanut brittle taste does get a little bit overpowering the more you munch.

Thankfully, the Peanut Brrr-ittle M&M’s feature a RESEALABLE ZIPPER! (their emphasis, not mine), so you can save a few to leave out for Santa on Christmas Eve.

Overall, these M&Ms are a perfect way to get your peanut brittle fix without any of the danger of burning yourself with hot sugar on the stove.

(Nutrition Facts – 1.5 ounces – 220 calories, 12 grams of fat, 4.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 20 milligrams of sodium, 26 grams of carbohydrates, 22 grams of sugar, 4 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $3.19
Size: 8 oz. bag
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: Caroling while eating. Roasted, caramel flavor. Oh so punny. RESEALABLE ZIPPER!
Cons: Stocking slalom on the way to the shelf. Overwhelming in large quantities.

REVIEW: Burger King Flamin’ Hot Mac N’ Cheetos

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Burger King Flamin Hot Mac n Cheetos

It’s an almost universally acknowledged fact that fast food marketers are about four years behind the rest of civilization. How else can you explain the packaging on Burger King’s new Flamin’ Hot Mac N’ Cheetos, which describes the item as “lit?” Jeez, you might as well throw in a “#BAE,” a “these are CRUNK” and maybe a couple of “shizzles,” for good measure.

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Regardless of the groan-inspiring “no, we’re hip and with it, for sure, dawg” artwork, I can assure you the recently revamped Mac N’ Cheetos are much better than the paper container they come in. For those of you who have never tried the regular BK Mac N’ Cheetos, I’d liken them to humongous, deep fried cheese sticks – which, as the name suggests, comes with a hearty smattering of Cheetos-flavored dust on the batter. Well, this variation ups the ante with a thick coating of Flamin’ Hot Cheetos spices, and it tastes pretty much identical to the puffed cornmeal snacks we all know and love.

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The exterior shell of these Mac N’ Cheetos is pretty dry, and the overall chewiness varies from piece to piece. Some pieces are fairly crunchy, while others are so hard it’ll snap the prongs off your plastic fork (which is what actually happened when I gave the product a taste test.) In terms of spiciness, I’d give it a respectable four or five out of ten, so if you don’t have a high tolerance for the hot stuff, you should still be able to enjoy them without breaking out the Tums or Kleenex.

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On the inside, the macaroni noodles are squishy but otherwise unremarkable. I’m almost 99.8 percent certain that’s Velveeta cheese spread on the inside, and that flavor is extremely powerful. So if you’re not a fan of gooey, buttery processed cheese, there’s your warning.

Overall, the snacks are tasty and surprisingly filling, with a spiciness that’s a tad more potent than you’d probably expect. Alas, they’re not without their demerits. First off, these things are EXTREMELY dry, with a sodium count the equivalent of swallowing half a teaspoon of table salt. And be prepared to dust red flakes off everything, because that Cheetos detritus flies like confetti every time you take a bite.

The big problem is that this five-count product desperately, direly needs a dipping sauce to accompany it. None of the usual Burger King sauces complement it all that well, and if you’re going to sell something containing half a day’s recommended daily allowance of salt, you at least owe us some on the house dressing to lubricate that stuff down our esophagi.

Which raises the question – what are you supposed to dip Cheetos in? Not that I’m trying to influence BK or anything, but Frito-Lay does already have a soy sauce-flavored Cheetos permutation in Japan.

(Nutrition Facts – 390 calories, 22 grams of fat, 4.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 15 milligrams of cholesterol, 1170 milligrams of sodium, 40 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of sugar, and 9 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $2.69
Size: 5 pieces
Rating: 6 out of 10
Pros: The cheesy interior is really hearty and flavorful. The Cheetos dust is respectably spicy. They’re basically humongous fried macaroni sticks, and I won’t ever complain about that.
Cons: These things will dry your throat out fast. Not having a decent dipping sauce option afforded to you. Wondering why the packaging is all but devoid of Chester Cheetah iconography.

REVIEW: Brach’s Fruit Cake Nougats

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Brach s Fruit Cake Nougats

In many European folk tales, a family discovers that their child has been replaced with a changeling, a hideous, ill-tempered fairy baby.

I think Brach’s has a changeling on its hands.

I have always loved their Christmas Nougats: wonderful white peppermint, gorgeous green wintergreen, and pretty pink cinnamon.

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But the new member of the family, Brach’s Fruit Cake Nougat, is nothing like its siblings. It’s brown. And it doesn’t have the festive tree in the middle—just a few fruity globs that are drab when mixed in with the brown.

When I open up the bag, I get a whiff that is vaguely reminiscent of baked goods. But not grandmotherly baked goods. I never lived in a fraternity, but I imagine this is what a baked good in a frat house smells like.

Brach s Fruit Cake Nougats 3

The flavor has that same off-putting baked-good vibe to it. Sometimes I detect a nuttiness. But mixed in with the baked good is a strong flavor of Fruity Pebbles. I like Fruity Pebbles, but not combined with whatever that other flavor is. Even once I’ve finished, the flavor lingers in my mouth.

Brach s Fruit Cake Nougats 4

I find it perplexing that they decided to go with a fruitcake flavor. I’ve always felt that fruitcake jokes are more common than fruitcakes themselves. I even had to buy a fruitcake as a point of reference, because I haven’t had them enough to remember what they taste like.

In addition to the gummy, fruity bits, Brach’s uses real cranberries and raisins. Props to them for trying to make it like an authentic fruitcake. I guess. These candies don’t taste like the fruitcake I got; the fruitcake actually tastes better.

I can’t help but wonder who is really going to buy this —- and then who is really going to like it. They had so many other holiday flavors to choose from. Spearmint, gingerbread, sugar cookie, eggnog, cranberry orange, hot cocoa -— not all of those would be good as nougat, but most of them would be better than fruitcake.

In many of those European folk tales, the family would throw the changeling into the fire. It would escape out the chimney, and their own child would be restored to them.

Brach’s should treat their Fruit Cake Nougat the way any sensible person would —- kill it with fire!

Then maybe we’d get to see a lovely Christmas Nougat baby that actually belongs in the family. Spearmint, perhaps?

(Nutrition Facts – 4 pieces – 130 calories, 2 grams of fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 35 milligrams of sodium, 27 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of dietary fiber, 21 grams of sugar (including 17 grams of added sugars), and 0 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: 9.5 oz. bag
Purchased at: Walgreens (exclusive flavor)
Rating: 3 out of 10
Pros: Uses actual cranberries and raisins. Has a Fruity Pebbles taste.
Cons: Tastes like baked goods from a frat house. Lingering flavor. As hideous as a changeling. Inferior to the other Christmas Nougats.

REVIEW: Hershey’s Gold Peanuts & Pretzels Bar

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Hershey s Gold Peanuts Pretzels Bar

HERSHEY’S GOLD – IT’S THE FIRST NEW HERSHEY BAR FLAVOR IN 20 YEARS!!! At least that’s what the press release and news articles screamed.

But didn’t I review a new Hershey’s Cherry Cheesecake bar flavor. a few months ago? And wasn’t I snarfing down non-chocolate flavor release since Cookies ‘n’ Creme in 1995. Like the C&C bar, Hershey’s Gold is a creme-based bar.

How is that different than a flavored white chocolate bar? I fell into a rabbit hole of internet research on what’s considered real “chocolate” and comparing ingredients from various Hershey’s bar flavors.

Three hours later, I realized there was a candy bar next to me, being NOT eaten. Focus! Let’s just say it’s a new Hershey’s bar flavor and consume it already.

Hershey s Gold Peanuts Pretzels Bar 2

This bar is a deep golden hue, as promised. The peanut and pretzel bits mixed in were tiny shards. I expected larger peanut chunks and hoped for crunchy pretzel balls in the style of the Cookies ‘n’ Creme cookie balls.

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A fun surprise was the new pip layout (yes, that’s what those squares are called, apparently). Instead of the standard uniform rectangles, these are offset with some larger ones. The design initially looked asymmetrical, but came together to satisfy my sense of geometric justice.

On first smell, this thing is ALL peanut butter. On first taste, same thing. Overwhelmingly peanut butter. I can’t discern any pretzel taste beyond a slight burst of salt. Same with the caramelized creme – a little toasty sweetness. These are flavors I associate already with peanut butter and PB-flavored foods, however, so to me they’re hard to separate out. What they do is blend seamlessly to make a really nice peanut butter bar. It’s creamy and salty and sweet, but not too much of any of those things.

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The texture was slightly crunchy, but a far cry from what I’d expect from peanuts and pretzels. As a big pretzel fan, I was disappointed in their shallow presence here. Had this been billed just a peanut butter bar, I’d say this was a great entry.

But the larger issue was — was it s’moreable? I grabbed some holiday Peeps and graham crackers and headed to the microwave. (Yeah, I’m one of those.)

Hershey s Gold Peanuts Pretzels Bar 5

18 seconds later – Holy peanuts, Batman. These are great. I think this bar is far more interesting as s’mores than as a candy bar.

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(Nutrition Facts – 1 bar – 220 calories, 14 grams of fat, 7 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 85 milligrams of sodium, 22 grams of carbohydrates, 20 grams of total sugars, 17 grams of added sugars, and 3 grams of protein.)

Purchased Price: $1.39
Size: 1.4 oz. bar
Purchased at: Duane Reade
Rating: 7 out of 10
Pros: Good peanut butter flavor. New artsy pip design. Incredibly S’morable.
Cons: Are you there pretzels? It’s me, Rachel. Still haven’t figured out the whole “first non-chocolate bar in 20 years” thing.
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