REVIEW: Salted Caramel Milky Way

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Milky Way Salted Caramel

What is Salted Caramel Milky Way?

I’m of two minds when it comes to salted caramel. On the one hand, “We added salt!” seems like the absolute bare minimum a company can do to differentiate its product. On the other, salt is a magic rock that makes everything taste better, and salted caramel demonstrates this particularly well.

Mars’ latest addition to its famed Milky Way line of products is the Salted Caramel Milky Way. According to the nutrition facts, a typical Milky Way 2 to Go bar has 75 milligrams of sodium, and this one has 170. Will adding 95 milligrams of rock be enough to rise above the competition?

How is it?

Unlike the more gourmet salted caramels that you might find, there are no salt flakes on the outside of these bars – they look like plain Milky Ways. As I bite into the bar, the saltiness is striking but not overwhelming. I’ve always found Milky Ways to be a bit too sweet, so it takes a fair bit of saltiness to balance it out.

Milky Way Salted Caramel 2

I take another bite and am surprised at the crunch. If this was a plain Milky Way, visions of insect endoskeletons and other foreign objects being ground into nougat would flash through my mind. In a salted caramel confection, it’s very pleasant. Context is everything. There may be not salt flakes on the outside, but they’re somewhere.

Is there anything else you need to know?

Given the vivid salty crunch, I expected to see some sizable flakes mixed in to the caramel, but close inspection doesn’t reveal any. This makes me think the caramel itself may not be the salted component in this bar.

But how to isolate the famously ooey-gooey bar into its constituent parts? The results of my freezer + meat mallet solution can be seen below.

Milky Way Salted Caramel Shattered

Picking through the shards of candy, I taste some bits that are mostly caramel and mostly nougat and am convinced that this is actually a “Salted Nougat Milky Way.” Salted Nougat sounds like the kind of weird old-fashioned candy that your grandfather ate at the 1904 World’s Fair, so it’s understandable that Mars went with the more popular Salted Caramel moniker.

Conclusion:

The Salted Caramel Milky Way bar is an excellent addition to the Milky Way line. It’s noticeably salty with crunchy bits, which may be off-putting for some, but if you’re a fan of salted caramel, you’ll love it.

Purchased Price: $1.48
Size: 3.16 oz.
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 bar) 210 calories, 8 grams of fat, 5 grams of saturated fat, less than 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 170 milligrams of sodium, 32 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 27 grams of sugar (including 25 grams added sugar), and 2 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Mountain Dew Maui Burst

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Mountain Dew Maui Burst

I’ve openly expressed my desire for a pineapple-flavored Mountain Dew for years to anyone who would listen and to stationary objects. I’ve thought about how it would look, smell, and taste. And I’ve dreamed about what would happen if that Dew became a reality. I imagined celebrating by slow dancing with a giant pineapple, squeezing it hard with so much joy that it explodes and makes it rain pineapple juice.

Well, I’m ready for my dance, giant pineapple! And that violent fruit dream is the reason why I don’t eat spicy pineapple salsa before going to sleep anymore.

Mountain Dew Maui Burst is currently an exclusive variety at Dollar General. Its can describes it as, “Dew with a blast of pineapple flavor. With other natural flavors.”

Mountain Dew Maui Burst Can Closeup

But before I get into how it tastes, I’m pretty sure many of you Dew Dew Heads, like myself, are wondering what kind of sweeteners are used. Well, I’m happy to report it’s good ol’ high fructose corn syrup, and that’s it. No sucralose. No acesulfame potassium. No stevia. No aspartame. No saccharin. No mogrosides. No beet sugar. No sugar alcohols. No cane sugar. Just H-F-C and S.

What I can detect with my nose and taste buds is that the pineapple is the star of the show, while the citrus Dew flavors take a backseat. Maui Burst’s flavor is like what I imagined it would be — a Mountain Dew that tastes like it’s been mixed with some pineapple juice. It’s simple, but I love it.

For me, it has easily jumped into my top five favorite Dew varieties of all time, which include Pitch Black, Code Red, and, of course, the original one. Also, I imagine this would go great with some Taco Bell.

Although I think it’s wonderful, I can see how some might feel the pineapple is a little too heavy-handed, like they’ve bear-hugged a giant pineapple while dancing with it, causing it to explode, and making it rain juice into their open mouths.

Mountain Dew Maui Burst Closeup

In my pre-Maui Burst dreams, I thought a pineapple Dew would be bright yellow. Fortunately, for Mtn Dew’s social media person, who would’ve been blasted with thousands of notifications with the word “pee” in them, it’s not. Instead, it’s a lighter shade of regular Mtn Dew.

Again, it’s a Dollar General exclusive, and, unfortunately, there are no Dollar General stores in Hawaii (hence the reason why I bought it on eBay). So folks on the island of Maui can’t get their hands on Mtn Dew Maui Burst, which is sad because it’s a great flavor.

Purchased Price: Too much on eBay
Size: 16 fl. oz. can
Purchased at: Dollar General
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (16 fl. oz.) 220 calories, 0 grams of fat, 75 milligrams of sodium, 59 grams of carbohydrates, 59 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Limited Edition Sprite Winter Spiced Cranberry

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Limited Edition Sprite Winter Spiced Cranberry

What is Limited Edition Sprite Winter Spiced Cranberry?

Joy to the world! It’s officially cranberry soda season, with Sprite taking the lead with its unique Winter Spiced Cranberry, a mixture of the classic lemon-lime taste of Sprite with a twist of cranberry and spiced with other “natural flavors.” What those spices are, however, I’m not sure.

How is it?

The thing about the holidays I like the most are all the surprises soda companies have in store for us. Like a carbonated Santa, the Limited Edition Sprite Winter Spiced Cranberry is definitely one of them.

I’m sure by the soda’s subtitle you have a basic idea about what you’re getting, but hold it, feel it, shake it — maybe don’t shake it — and when you finally open this bottle of Sprite, the cranberry flavoring is ever so slight, with the heavily spiced (of what, I may continue to ask?) quotient truly making this a drink for the season.

Limited Edition Sprite Winter Spiced Cranberry 2

With a taste that’s reminiscent of ginger ale and crushed ornaments, it’s a cool sparkling beverage that feels more like an extra-sweetened holiday La Croix than anything Sprite has ever produced before. That being said, it ain’t all that bad, especially if you need a gentle stomach-setter after eating eight or nine of Tia Lupita’s deviled ham tamales. Yum!

Is there anything else you need to know?

One 20-ounce bottle contains 109% of your daily recommended allowance of sugars. That some sugar for today, and some for tomorrow also. Space out your sips!

Conclusion:

Sadly, there’s no Sprite Zero companion liquid to this, but, still, if you need one holiday soda (that’s not cinnamon flavored, natch) to get you through the 12 days of whatever holiday you may choose or not choose, I suppose you should probably make it this one.

Purchased Price: $1.98
Size: 20 fl. oz. bottle
Purchased at: Winco
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 Bottle) 200 calories, 0 grams of fat, 110 milligrams of sodium, 54 grams of carbohydrates, 54 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Lotus Biscoff Ice Cream

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Lotus Biscoff Ice Cream with Blueberry Cheesecake

Way before “lotus” was used in the names of 50 percent of all yoga studios in the world, the name Lotus was mostly associated with Biscoff speculoos cookies (and the Kama Sutra). Later, the company crushed those cookies to makes its famous cookie butter. Now, it’s using its name and cookies to sell ice cream.

Biscoff Ice Cream is available in five flavors — Original, Salted Caramel, Blueberry Cheesecake, Belgian Chocolate Chip, and Chocolate Brownies. Unfortunately, I was able to find only the Blueberry Cheesecake and Chocolate Brownies versions.

Lotus Biscoff Ice Cream 5 Pizza Lid

After pulling back the flimsy paper lid, I’m face-to-foil with a shiny protective cover that I assume tells me to either wait five minutes before eating or consume five slices of pizza before eating. Because I didn’t have any pizza, I went with the former.

Although, I didn’t wait five minutes because I assume, like microwave wattages will vary cooking times, living on a tropical island with the current temperature being in the mid-80s should reduce those five minutes down to two or three. Pulling back the pizza pushing or just plain pushy foil lid reveals a layer of crushed speculoos cookies.

Lotus Biscoff Ice Cream Blueberry Cheesecake Top

According to the flimsy container, the blueberry cheesecake one features “dairy ice cream and crunchy Lotus Biscoff cookies paired with blueberry cheesecake.” But to be more exact, it seems to be more like vanilla ice cream with a blueberry cheesecake swirl and crunchy Lotus Biscoff cookie bits.

Lotus Biscoff Ice Cream Blueberry Cheesecake Inside

This one is my favorite of those I purchased. It tastes like what I expect — blueberry cheesecake with a speculoos cookie crust. And it is wonderful. There’s a nice tang and bold blueberry flavor from the swirl, and the speculoos crumbs add a pleasant spiced flavor and a crunchy texture. At first, I thought the cookies on top were all that the near-pint had, but it seems as if there are also bits suspended throughout the ice cream.

Lotus Biscoff Ice Cream with Chocolate Brownies

The chocolate brownie version has Biscoff and chocolate ice cream with chunks of dark chocolate brownies, cookie butter, and crunchy Lotus Biscoff Cookies. Just reading the previous sentence would usually make my mouth water, but after eating the ice cream, I can’t help but share my slight disappointment.

Lotus Biscoff Ice Cream with Chocolate Brownies Top

First off, the crushed up cookies on the top are, for some reason, not at all crunchy like the ones on the blueberry cheesecake flavor. Oh, their flavor is there, but it’s not the same without the crunch. Also, there doesn’t seem to be any bits in the ice cream. Instead, they’re replaced with a cookie butter swirl that doesn’t have a recognizable texture and doesn’t snake through the pint as much as I would like.

Lotus Biscoff Ice Cream with Chocolate Brownies Inside

Another disappointment is the number of brownie chunks in the pint. It seems like I experienced a ratio of one brownie chunk for every four dips into the near-pint. Whatever pieces there are, they provide an added burst of chocolatey flavor within the chocolate ice cream.

With all that said, the combination of chocolate and Biscoff cookies is tasty, but being a texture guy, I wish there was a crunchiness. Now, maybe I got a lousy not-quite-a-pint, so if you had crunchy cookies in yours, let me know.

Lotus Biscoff Ice Cream Dents

While I like the flavors, the containers they come in annoy me. The one thing I noticed and disliked the moment I picked one up was how rickety the paper containers feel. When I grab it, the walls of the packaging cave in to the point where I feel either the whole thing is going to fall apart, or I’m going to squeeze it so much that all the ice cream pops out like I’m Popeye with a can of spinach. It makes me feel as if I suddenly have superhuman strength and can’t control it.

Some of you might think this is superficial nonsense, and that’s fine. But I’d like to enjoy these tasty ice creams without being paranoid about the container falling apart if I grip it a little too tightly.

Purchased Price: $4.49 each
Size: 15.55 fl. oz.
Purchased at: Target
Rating: 8 out of 10 (Blueberry Cheesecake), 6 out of 10 (Chocolate Brownies)
Nutrition Facts: (1/2 cup) Blueberry Cheesecake – 150 calories, 7 grams of fat, 5 grams of saturated fat, 15 milligrams of cholesterol, 55 milligrams of sodium, 19 grams of carbohydrates, 15 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein. Chocolate Brownies – 190 calories, 11 grams of fat, 5 grams of saturated fat, 15 milligrams of cholesterol, 85 milligrams of sodium, 19 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 15 grams of sugar, and 3 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Coca-Cola Cinnamon

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Coca Cola Cinnamon

What is Coca-Cola Cinnamon?

Like every other brand, it’s Spice Season over at the Coca-Cola Company. Thankfully for us, it’s opted to add cinnamon to its classic recipe instead of pumpkin.

How is it?

Coca-Cola Cinnamon smells and tastes like someone added about a teaspoon of cinnamon powder to a bottle of Coke. I wouldn’t say it’s subtle, but it’s also not overwhelming. The cinnamon flavor rides the line nicely.

Coca Cola Cinnamon Closup

After the quick, overwhelming bursts of effervescence in each sip fade, you get a little hint of the warm spice. I think I prefer this to regular Cola, which is usually only a drink of choice for me when mixed with something harder, but this isn’t too big of a departure from the classic you’re used to.

Honestly, they probably could have gone a little further with the cinnamon flavor, but I’m not complaining.

Is there anything else you need to know?

The best part of the said flavor is the fact that the usual dryness does not follow it. No matter what I have with cinnamon, I always feel like I ate a handful of the Sahara and need to chug a bottle of water immediately.

Coca Cola Cinnamon Label

Oh, and cinnamon is not in the ingredients. This is a “cinnamon flavored” soda. It seems odd to me, but maybe it’s an allergen thing or something. Why not use the real thing?

Conclusion:

Coke has a winner here. This is gonna go over well with the masses as there is enough cinnamon to separate it from regular Coke, but not enough to make people feel like they’re taking the Cinnamon Challenge.

I’m probably gonna pick up another bottle to try as a mixer. I also kinda want to try using a cinnamon stick as a straw the next time because I am a child.

I hope it does well, and it pushes Coca-Cola to get more creative because a Cinnamon Vanilla Coke would be a God-tier soda.

Purchased Price: $2.12
Size: 20 fl. oz. bottle
Purchased at: Quick Check
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 Bottle) 240 calories, 0 grams of fat, 55 milligrams of sodium, 65 grams of carbohydrates, 65 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

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