REVIEW: Taco Bell Confetti Cookie Freeze

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Taco Bell Confetti Cookie Freeze cup

Ah, the holidays! A season of peppermint, eggnog… and, if recent product releases are to be believed, confetti? I guess it makes sense with so much to celebrate this time of year, and as someone whose wedding cake was Funfetti, I for one couldn’t be happier with this trend—especially Taco Bell’s Confetti Cookie Freeze.

When I think of Freeze flavors, I think fruity: strawberry, margarita, Baja Blast… so my attention was piqued by a flavor on the different side of the sugary spectrum, more “bakery counter” than “produce section”. I’ll admit, though, I was a little thrown by the premise of a “confetti cookie” rather than “confetti cake,” and a bit disappointed to realize that there would not be real chunks of cookies blended in there.

I wasn’t disappointed for long, though. After some light misadventures—an employee who forlornly informed me “We don’t have that right now… and we might never get it…,” a chilly mile-long walk to the next nearest Taco Bell, and a flurry of mild terror from the new trainee who took my order—the Confetti Cookie Freeze was in my gloved hands. Nothing like a cold drink on a cold night, eh? Well, when a drink is as delicious as this one, I’ll enjoy it any time.

Taco Bell Confetti Cookie Freeze from above

The base is a vanilla slushie, which is swirled quite thoroughly with a “pink sugar cookie flavored syrup.” The Freeze is also studded with tiny round rainbow sprinkles, more for aesthetic than taste (when cold, they’re extremely hard, and I wouldn’t recommend chomping down directly on them). Though Taco Bell’s website states that this drink also includes “a swirl of creamy vanilla crème,” I couldn’t visually distinguish that from the white base. Visually, the whole thing is reminiscent of Mother’s Animal Cookies—which I, of course, mean as the highest compliment.

Taco Bell Confetti Cookie Freeze sprinkles

It should come as no surprise to you that this drink is very sweet. However, I was surprised by how rich it tasted for something primarily consisting of ice. That’s where the crème comes in, lending some dairy-like smoothness to round out the grittiness of the slush. The pink syrup is also a powerhouse, reminding me of frosting with its powerful sugariness. Could those pillowy technicolor Lofthouse cookies be another inspiration? (Wow, I never realized how many different desserts are pink and sprinkled.) When I tried to ascribe a more specific flavor to the syrup, the idea of bubblegum briefly crossed my mind—perhaps because of the slight synthetic aftertaste, perhaps just because of the drink’s color—but that’s not quite right. Even if the sweetness is a bit generic, though, I don’t think that’s a bad thing.

Taco Bell Confetti Cookie Freeze sign

The Confetti Cookie Freeze is a creative, fresh idea that I was excited to see on Taco Bell’s menu. If you’re curious, go try it for yourself; like fallen confetti, I don’t think it’ll stick around long. But despite that, I have a feeling that, like the stray confetti pieces that you might unearth from the corners of your house months later, the sweet memories of this dessert will stick with me even longer.

Purchased Price: $4.34
Size: Regular (16 oz)
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 220 calories, 1 gram of fat, less than 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 80 milligrams of sodium, 55 grams of carbohydrates, 53 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal

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Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal box

When I saw Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal on the grocery store shelf, I didn’t realize it was a new product. Even though it is new cereal season (and new ice cream season—the most wonderful time of year indeed), I thought I had tried the product before.

I may have gotten Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal confused with Peanut Butter Toast Crunch, which this site reviewed in both 2004 and 2013. However, Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal is a different product. Unlike the previous variety, which boasted a purely peanut butter flavor, Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal combines peanut butter flavor with the brand’s signature Cinnadust.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal back of box

The package doesn’t make this distinction obvious, unless you read the back of the box. I was not motivated to read the back of the box because I hadn’t done so since cereal boxes promised prizes inside. My cereal-related memory is so long that the only prize I look for now is added fiber.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal in a bowl

With the cereal’s identity clarified, Cinnamon Toast Crunch’s latest decennial experiment with peanut butter is just okay. The familiar toasty, crispy squares do not have a consistently noticeable amount of peanut butter flavor. The cinnamon sugar taste is more prominent, although the cereal appears to use less Cinnadust than standard Cinnamon Toast Crunch. The result is a lightly spiced, subtly nutty cereal.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal close up

If you are dubious about peanut butter and cinnamon complementing each other, the flavor combination works and is reminiscent of cookie butter. In this cereal, the flavors aren’t bad, just diluted. Imagine spreading peanut butter on your toast, scraping it off, and applying a little cinnamon sugar instead. Maybe you only have a few grains of cinnamon sugar left, or maybe a small gust of wind blows through your kitchen and lifts the Cinnadust right off your toast. What a way to start the morning—you should have gone with the fiber.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal in milk

In milk, the peanut butter wakes up and asks to be noticed. It still is light compared to other peanut butter cereals, but the milk gives the peanut butter flavor a richer, creamier vibe while weakening the Cinnadust. The cinnamon milk that gets left behind still satisfies.

Compared to original Cinnamon Toast Crunch or really good peanut butter cereal (see: Peanut Butter Lovers Reese’s Puffs), Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal tastes like a partial attempt at both cinnamon and peanut butter. To everything, there is a season, and maybe Cinnamon Toast Crunch will produce a perfect peanut butter pairing next time.

Purchased Price: $5.69
Purchased at: Giant Eagle
Size: 12.3 oz (348 g) box
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (per 1 cup) 170 calories, 4.5 grams of fat, 1 gram of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 270 milligrams of sodium, 32 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of fiber, 10 grams of sugar, and 4 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Ben & Jerry’s Ice Cream Bars

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Ben & Jerry's Cookie Dough Ice Cream Bars box

For as long as I have consistently perused the mainstream frozen foods aisle at grocery stores, two things have always stayed true: Ben & Jerry’s makes the best widely available pints, and Häagen-Dazs has the best bars. But that gap may be closing. To kick off the new year, Ben & Jerry’s has an all-new line of ice cream bars, in an array that pays homage to some of your favorite Ben & Jerry’s pints, which include Cookie Dough and Strawberry Cheesecake.

Ben & Jerry's Cookie Dough Ice Cream Bars exterior

If there is any flavor that is now ubiquitous with Ben & Jerry’s, it has to be Chocolate Chip Cookie Dough (I know Cherry Garcia is great too, but, c’mon!). As the first company to put dough into their pints it makes sense that this is the one it is pushing forward with the hardest, as it will be available in both grocery four packs and single servings in convenience stores like 7-Eleven. Ben & Jerry’s Cookie Dough bar is vanilla ice cream with gobs of chocolate chip cookie dough, dipped in chocolatey coating with cookie pieces.

Ben & Jerry's Cookie Dough Ice Cream Bars interior with vanilla ice cream and cookie dough

Ben & Jerry’s has a good, solid vanilla base that comes through in this bar. The decently-sized cookie dough chunks pop up a respectable amount, about four per bar, which gives every other bite a hefty helping of gritty brown sugar flavor and texture. While the base and mix-in are solid, the real surprise element that brings the experience together is the cookie pieces mixed into the chocolate. The little extra bit of grit and nuanced cookie flavor, along with the melty cocoa taste, really elevates it to something more than your typical frozen confection, and it’s great.

Ben & Jerry's Strawberry Shortcake Ice Cream Bars box

On another band of the flavor spectrum, we have the Strawberry Cheesecake bar, which is cheesecake ice cream with strawberry swirls, dipped in white chocolatey coating with graham cracker pieces. I have never personally been a fan of the Strawberry Cheesecake pint, but this bar iteration is absolutely fantastic. The cheesecake ice cream is smooth and only subtly tangy, while the swirls provide a sweet acidity with a sugary finish that truly is a match made in heaven.

Ben & Jerry's Strawberry Shortcake Ice Cream Bars exterior with white creme and graham pieces

Yet again, what really makes this bar shine is the coating. Not only is the white chocolate delightfully sugary and decadent, but the graham pieces bring a bolder crunch and saltiness that make for one of the better ice cream bars from any company I have had in years.

Ben & Jerry's Strawberry Shortcake Ice Cream Bars interior with cheesecake ice cream and strawberry swirls

The concept with these new novelties is simple, but they are executed wonderfully. The Ben & Jerry’s ice cream bars serve as a snapshot of what digging into one of their more storied pints can be in a fraction of the time and calories. And if you’re feeling generous, they’re easy to share, too.

DISCLOSURE: I received free product samples from Ben & Jerry’s. Doing so did not influence my review.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 4 2.5-ounce bars
Purchased at: Received from Ben & Jerry’s
Rating: 8 out of 10 (Cookie Dough), 9 out of 10 (Strawberry Cheesecake)
Nutrition Facts: (1 bar) Cookie Dough – 200 calories, 12 grams of fat, 8 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 30 milligrams of cholesterol, 40 milligrams of sodium, 22 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 17 grams of total sugars, and 3 grams of protein. Strawberry Cheesecake – 200 calories, 11 grams of fat, 8 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 30 milligrams of cholesterol, 90 milligrams of sodium, 23 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 21 grams of total sugars, and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Milano Mango White Chocolate Cookies

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Pepperidge Farm Milano Cookies belong in a very specific, subjective category of accessible snack foods that I have always perceived to be a little fancy. Along with gold-wrapped Ferrero Rocher and snooty French Grey Poupon, Milano cookies have a certain air of elegance even though they share the same grocery store shelf as Oreos and Chips Ahoy. Everyone loves an Oreo, of course, but can they be called distinctive?

Milano’s line of white chocolate flavors has somewhat reinvigorated this stereotype of fanciness for me, and so finding its Mango White Chocolate Cookies felt like striking gold. The line includes Lemon, Strawberry, and Coconut flavors, all of which I have previously enjoyed.

Mango joins their tasty ranks, but with a caveat: the mango flavor is an imposter. There is a floral fruitiness to the cookies that is reminiscent of mango, but it lacks the fruit’s bright, tropical flair. If I were blindfolded (this is Milano, so I imagine the blindfold must be silk), I would guess the fruit flavor to be apricot. The subtle, honeyed flavor reminds me of the apricot jam-filled thumbprint or kolachi cookies available in bakeries, except with added sweetness from the white chocolate. If you manage to taste the orange-colored mango component of the filling separately, the tart pineapple-y notes are more discernible—but you may need to decimate the sandwich cookies to get there.

Of course, Milano cookies are known for their delicate, crumbly biscuits. The buttery vanilla cookies lend themselves beautifully to the filling’s flavor. While the filling only insinuates mango, it does yield a balanced, light, and sweet cookie that pairs well with tea. More mango flavor might overshadow the biscuit or rely on an overly artificial, candylike flavor, and how uncouth that would be for a so-called fancy cookie.

Milano Mango White Chocolate Cookies split

Milano Mango White Chocolate Cookies may fall short of the concentrated flavor burst that tropical fruit fans love, but they are still a worthy addition to the white chocolate product line. Of the flavors so far, I like them second best (after the exquisite Lemon variety) and humbly petition for raspberry and blueberry flavors too—please and thank you, Pepperidge Farm! While I should delicately savor these cookies per the line’s elegant aesthetic, I can’t promise I won’t devour them instead.

Purchased Price: $4.69
Size: 7 oz package
Purchased at: Wegmans
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 cookies) 140 calories, 7 grams of fat, 4.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, less than 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 40 milligrams of sodium, 17 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 9 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Cheetos Simply NKD Puffs

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Cheetos Simply NKD Puffs bag

Allow me to get political for a second…

Don’t worry, I’ll try to toe (tow?) the line like a spineless coward.

Where are we at with the health administration discourse? Are these food dyes we devour every day really a crisis, or is eliminating them just a gimmicky distraction? Shocking to no one, I’ve heard both arguments.

I’m a little cynical. On one hand, it feels like an absolute bare minimum the food industry can do to pretend they’re feeding us “healthier” food. However, I also see no reason why synthetic food dyes and artificial flavors should exist if there’s even a 1% chance they’re harming us.

No matter your stance, Frito Lay has started the process for you. It’s begun phasing out synthetic food dyes and artificial flavors with a new Simply “NKD” line of snacks, because no one, and I mean NO ONE, likes Cheeto fingers.

That is my nonpartisan way of interpreting this.

Let’s stop arguing about things we should all agree on and focus our energy on real debates, like whether it’s “toe the line” or “tow the line,” because I’ve never been confident and couldn’t commit to either one. I’m sorry, I’m just a moderate on this issue.

“Chee-to the line.” There it is.

Cheetos Simply NKD Puffs naked of dyes

Cheetos Simply NKD Puffs no artificial flavor or dyes

Do you like Cheetos Puffs? Well, hopefully you liked them for their flavor and not their color, because “NKD” might be the wave of the future.

Warning: nudity ahead, this review may be NSFW!

Cheetos Simply NKD Puffs censored

Cheetos are good and will remain good. I can’t say it any more simply … as these are technically “Simply” Cheetos, which I didn’t even know still existed. I thought that was the discontinued line that gave people gastrointestinal issues.

Cheetos Simply NKD Puffs vs regular Cheetos

I reviewed the “NKD” Cheetos against regular old classic puffs, and honestly didn’t taste much of a difference. It was minor, and that was comparing a regular Cheeto vs. a “Simply,” which is marketed as a “cleaner” cheese puff that uses “real” ingredients.

Cheetos Simply NKD Puffs in a bowl

These are devoid of color but still have plenty of flavor. If anyone tells you there’s a big discrepancy, they’re just outraged by change. I think the NKD puffs taste just a little blander, and that’s the “Simply” of it all, as I don’t believe the orange dust was a flavor enhancer, but classics do “pop” with a tiny bit more long-lasting flavor.

If this is how we have to enjoy Cheetos moving forward, we’re gonna be fine. We’ll heal, hopefully together.

I like the puffs, but I don’t love the branding. I can’t help but feel like the bag is designed to trick people into thinking they’re a fancy health food. Don’t slack off on your diet, just because they un-dye it.

Speaking of vibes, I hate the “we’re a hot new start-up” style name, “NKD!” Did they really need to remove the “a-e?” Maybe they’re just holding them back as an “i-o-u.” … and sometimes “y!”

It’s quite literally stripped down, unlike that very complex vowel joke.

Oh, and Chester Cheetah is nude on the bag. He goes by “Chest-hair Cheetah,” now.

Cheetos Simply NKD Puffs Chester naked

Just kidding, that perv has always been naked.

These Cheetos may be a bit less dangerous, but they are, like my comedy stylings, still “dangerously cheesy.”

So, they’re a little less fun looking. Oh well. We’ll live… if the government lets us. Vote or Dye!

Purchased Price: $3.97
Size: 8 oz bag
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (13 pieces) 160 calories, 10 grams of fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 140 milligrams of sodium, 16 grams of total carbohydrates, 1 gram of total sugars, 1 gram of dietary fiber, and 2 grams of protein.

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