REVIEW: Frosted Chocolatey Churro Pop-Tarts

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Kellogg s Frosted Chocolatey Churro Pop Tarts

What are Frosted Chocolatey Churro Pop-Tarts?

There is one food so glorious that one is willing – happy, even – to buy them from the woman on the grungy subway platform with a Saran-covered baking tray of them teetering atop a granny cart. Churros! If you’ve never had those crusty-on-the-outside, soft inside, star-shaped tubes of fried dough sprinkled with cinnamon sugar, what kind of life are you living?

Well, Pop-Tarts have brought the chocolate-dipped churro experience to the breakfast table, and I, for one, was stoked. They have the standard Pop-Tart pastry envelope with a chocolate-cinnamon filling. There’s even a little curly-bottomed churro dunked in chocolate on the box. Cuuute!

Kellogg s Frosted Chocolatey Churro Pop Tarts 2

How is it?

The first glance at these Pop-Tarts did not bode well. They were way too light. Like someone left the Churro Pop-Tarts from the photo on the box out on the window sill all summer in the sun.

Kellogg s Frosted Chocolatey Churro Pop Tarts 3

Churros can’t be pale! They should be “golden brown” at least, but I’ll always go for darker churros. Darker = crustier, and I love facing the danger of shredding the roof of my mouth with a dessert food.

Flavor-wise, I can sum it up in one photo:

Kellogg s Frosted Chocolatey Churro Pop Tarts 4

Yeah, these taste EXACTLY like the Frosted Brown Sugar Cinnamon Pop-Tarts. I love that flavor, I’ve eaten many of them in my time. But here, I wanted something different. The churro-flavored 2019 Mystery Oreo cookies were SO good – I was hoping these would be at that level or better. They needed to represent that slight savoriness that fried sweet things have.

Kellogg s Frosted Chocolatey Churro Pop Tarts 5

Anything else you need to know?

I’m not usually a fan of toasting, but I tried it here (churros are best hot, right?). While it did add a crispiness to the pastry, it did not raise this Pop-Tart to churro-level perfection. However, I decided to lightly brush the pastry with a mixture of water, brown sugar and cinnamon and drop that in the toaster (using a non-stick bag meant for making grilled cheese in the toaster). Once cooled, this hack did give the pastry a granular sugar feel like a churro, and certainly made it look more like something I’d buy on the Atlantic Avenue R train platform.

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Conclusion:

Meh. Just buy the Frosted Brown Sugar Cinnamon ones. They’re easier to find.

Purchased Price: $3.68
Size: 20 oz. box / 16 toaster pastries
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 6 out of 10 (for unoriginality)
Nutrition Facts: (2 pastries) 400 calories, 13 grams of fat, 4.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 330 milligrams of sodium, 68 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 31 grams of sugar, and 4 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Wendy’s Baconator Pringles

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Wendy s Baconator Pringles

Like many of you, I imagine, going to the grocery store is one of my absolute favorite things to do. When I turned 30, I got a birthday card that said on the inside, “You have a favorite grocery store now” as though I hadn’t had one since my 20th birthday? Ha!

Anyway, there I was this past Tuesday, strolling along the aisles of the Skokie Jewel-Osco (an Albertson’s chain, for anyone eager to find these crisps) when I spotted an endcap display wall of glowing Wendy’s signs. Okay, they weren’t glowing, but the bright illuminated red Wendy’s sign graphic on the black tube of Pringles made it LOOK like they were glowing. This store had the new Limited Time Only Wendy’s Baconator Pringles.

Pringles has pulled off some pretty complex flavor combinations before, and I was eager to try these out. The image on the front is the classic, original Baconator with two quarter-pound patties, six strips of bacon, cheese, ketchup, and mayo on a bun.

Wendy s Baconator Pringles 2

Wendy appears on the pop-top lid and there’s a code printed on the underside of the lid for an offer for a free Baconator, Son of Baconator, or Breakfast Baconator with a purchase when you order using the Wendy’s app.

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I was ready for this tube (can? cylinder?) of Pringles to have an overwhelming bacon smell, but it actually was balanced from start to finish, and the crisps were visibly seasoned with a light orange powder (I always prefer it when I can see the seasoning, don’t you?).

There are an awful lot of artificial bacon flavored and scented items out there, and some of them are offensive – this isn’t one of those items. These crisps have tangy sauce flavor, onion, and a great balance of bacon and charred burger.

Compared to the Baconator itself, the crisps could have used a little more bacon flavor, but I appreciate that they didn’t just make a bacon-flavored chip. These crisps taste like meat.

Wendy s Baconator Pringles 4

The aftertaste is slightly sweet, almost like Cheerios. Maybe they were going for bun flavor? But if you don’t like the aftertaste, just shove more meat crisps into your gob, you goof.

Overall these are a surprisingly balanced crisp that do taste like all the elements of a Baconator. Maybe Pringles will bang out a fried egg-flavored crisp next and we’ll have an excuse to eat Breakfast Baconator Pringles in the morning.

I’d try it.

I sincerely hope you’re able to locate these Baconator Pringles. If you’re in the Venn Diagram of people who love Wendy’s and people who love Pringles, these are a little slice of heaven just for you.

Purchased Price: $1.99
Size: 5.5oz can
Purchased at: Jewel-Osco
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (15 crisps/28 g) 150 calories, 9 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 220 milligrams of sodium, 16 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, less than 1 gram of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Sonic Brownie Batter Master Shake

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Sonic Brownie Batter Master Shake

What is the Sonic Brownie Batter Master Shake?

Have you ever had the urge to take a big sip of brownie mix before putting it in the oven? Well, I’d suggest stopping by Sonic now that they’ve essentially created a liquid brownie.

Sonic Brownie Batter Master Shake Top

How is it?

As delicious as “brownie a la mode sipped through a straw” sounds, this is a shake of diminishing returns.

Sonic Brownie Batter Master Shake Brownie Bits

At first, the mix of vanilla ice cream, ribbons of brownie batter, and soft little chunks of brownie bits was borderline perfect. The batter and ice cream pairing highlights the vanilla base while also giving it a strong brownie flavor. And the little Cocoa Puffs-sized brownie bites were small enough to fit through the straw without making me suck to the point of a brain hemorrhage. We were on our way to a world-class shake.

Sonic Brownie Batter Master Shake Bottom

As I sipped away the ice cream, I lost interest in the shake entirely. In fairness, I should have expected this from the name, but the massive reservoir of batter at the bottom of the cup was a buzzkill.

It was just a three-inch deep pile of dark chocolate sludge that was loaded with mini chocolate chips. The last few sips of any shake are usually gross on their own, but that paired with the texture and temperature of the brownie mix made for a real downer of an ending.

Anything else you need to know?

I know what you’re thinking. He’s complaining about the brownie batter in a brownie batter-flavored shake. I know, I know, but the bottom was like getting a soda and sipping four sips of straight flavor syrup at the bottom of the can. It’s too much.

By the way, I’m not positive what constitutes a “Master Shake,” but I’m bummed Sonic didn’t also release a Frylock and a Meatwad to go along with this.

Conclusion:

I love chewy brownies, and I was well on my way to loving this shake, but it wasn’t constructed well. It could have been that mine wasn’t mixed properly at the restaurant. Get a mini size, give it a good mix before drinking, and I think you’ll be ok.

Purchased Price: $3.89
Size: Small
Purchased at: Sonic
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 760 calories, 431 grams of fat, 1 gram of trans fat, 26 grams of saturated fat, 450 milligrams of sodium, 85 grams of total carbohydrates, 57 grams of total sugars, 1 gram of fiber, and 11 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Ben & Jerry’s Limited Batch Boots on the Moooo’n Ice Cream

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Ben Jerry s Limited Batch Boots on the Moooo n Ice Cream

Ben & Jerry’s new Boots on the Moooo’n Ice Cream is another collaboration with Netflix, but this time it’s inspired by the streaming service’s new series, Space Force.

Why is it called Boots on the Moooo’n?

Well, let’s just say if you’re playing a drinking game while watching Space Force’s first episode and you have to take a shot every time the words “boots on the moon” are said, you will probably not remember how the episode ended.

According to its container, the flavor is “a universe of milk chocolate ice cream with fudge cows & toffee meteor clusters orbiting a sugar cookie dough core.”

Here’s the thing about the universe; it’s vast and dwarfs anything in it, making everything else inconsequential. And that is also an appropriate way to describe the presence of the milk chocolate ice cream in this pint.

Ben Jerry s Limited Batch Boots on the Moooo n Ice Cream Pint

While the sugar cookie dough core has a nice gritty texture and a pleasant, sweet flavor on its own, it gets lost in my mouth when combined with the chocolate ice cream. I guess one could say, if they were reaching for a space reference, that the chocolate base is like a black hole that absorbs the flavor of the cookie dough core.

Yes, your spoon will be in the same orbit as a fudge cow or toffee meteor once in a while, but the fudge just amps up the choco flavor. As for the toffee meteors, while they do add a nuttiness and wonderful crunch that contrast the creamy chocolate base, they’re like major meteors showers in that they only show up every so often.

If I’m comparing Boots on the Moooo’n to the other Netflix and Ben & Jerry’s collaborations, this is the least impressive of them.

With that said, I have to say I like this pint as much as I like watching Space Force. They’re both interesting enough that I’ll finish them because it’s hard to go too wrong with either Ben & Jerry’s chocolate ice cream or Steve Carell.

Also, I need something to watch because I’ve already gone through all the new episodes of Queer Eye and The Big Flower Fight.

But the show and ice cream aren’t must-binges.

DISCLOSURE: I received a free sample of the product from Ben & Jerry’s. Doing so did not influence my review in any way.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 1 pint
Purchased at: Received from Ben & Jerry’s
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2/3 cup) 420 calories, 26 grams of fat, 14 grams of saturated fat, 0.5 grams of trans fat, 65 milligrams of cholesterol, 115 milligrams of sodium, 41 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 34 grams of sugar, and 6 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Snickers Oats (Thailand)

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Snickers Oats

What is Snickers Oats?

Official word is that these are Snickers bars (nougat, peanuts, caramel, chocolate coating) with oats added. Sounds simple enough. I’m actually surprised these haven’t surfaced earlier.

Now, I’m no fan of oatmeal (and by that, I mean I can’t stand that devil’s pancake batter) but I have been known to polish off a container of oatmeal cookies in one sitting when there weren’t other cookies around. They’re not my go-to, but I always think “oh, right – these are pretty good,” when I’m actually eating them. I wasn’t sure if these would be oat-meal-y (blech) or oat-cookie-y (mmm-kaaaayyy).

Snickers Oats 2

How is it?

These are true to the description – Snickers + oats. The nougat is supposed to be the garden variety, but to me the texture was denser and the flavor was more cake-like.

When I cut away the chocolate coating, the inside was PACKED with oats. With the caramel and chocolate coating, it amounted to a cross between a middle-of-the-road granola bar and a middle-of-the-road oatmeal cookie. The combination left me kinda meh. It’s somehow less exciting than a plain Snickers. In fact, I would deem these the Colin Robinson of Snickers bars – I sorta dozed off and don’t really remember eating the rest of it. It might have stolen my life force.

Snickers Oats 3

Anything else you need to know?

I have not seen these in specialty stores, so ordering online is the way to go if you really must have the blandest Snickers.

Snickers Oats 4

Conclusion:

If you wear a lot of beige, regularly comment on the weather, and listen to Nickelback (yeah, I know, it’s an easy and dated joke, but I’ve yet to encounter a rabid Nickelback fan who’ll fight back), you’re gonna love this Snickerzzzzzzz bar. Novelty junkies – steer clear.

Purchased Price: $3.99
Size: (2) 20-gram mini bars
Purchased at: Mexican Candy Lady
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 mini bars) 184 calories, 7.6 grams of fat, 3.2 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 2 milligrams of cholesterol, 78 milligrams of sodium, 25.4 grams of carbohydrates, 1.4 grams of fiber, 18.9 grams of sugar, and 3 grams of protein.

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