REVIEW: Little Debbie Nutty Bars Ice Cream Bars

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Little Debbie is getting a little too big for her britches.

A snack cake empire just wasn’t enough for Big Deb. Now she’s taking over the ice cream and cereal game too. If a chocolate treat is sold in the park, Notorious D.E.B. wants in on it, and ya know what? It’s working.

I’ve been hoovering up every new thing she slaps her name on, and on my way to literally getting too big for my britches. In fact, with the push to conquer the supermarkets, the Little Debbie empire’s new motto is “Britches get stitches.”

I’m sure you have your favorite Little Debbie product. For me, it’s always been Nutty Bars, formerly Nutty Buddies, or Nutty Buddies formerly Nutty Bars. I’ll be honest, I’ve lost track of the name and feel like I’m trapped in a Mandela Effect vortex. Either way, Nutty Blanks are amazing.

I loved the cereal Deb dropped a few months ago, so you know I had to try the ice cream bars.

Nutty Bars Ice Cream Bars consist of peanut butter ice cream dipped in a crispy milk chocolate shell. All the elements of the iconic snack bar are there, so it burns me to tell you that, well, these don’t really come too close to the OGs.

These are good, and I’ll give them credit for having a very satisfying texture. The ice cream is a perfect consistency for a bar like this. It’s not a frozen block, but it’s also not melty and holds its form well. The outer shell is actually top-tier, and the crispies are plentiful while adding a solid amount of crunch.

With that said, these just aren’t good enough for something inspired by the Little Debbie Nutty Bar.

The peanut butter ice cream is kinda bland. Not only does it not look like peanut butter ice cream, but it also doesn’t explode with peanut butter flavor.

I compared the ice cream bar to the actual Nutty Bars, and while those have a pretty mild peanut butter flavor in the grand scheme as well, the ice cream really needed to have a strong peanut butter taste to make these things pop.

While I like the crispies, what ultimately gets lost here is the wafer. Nutty Bars have such a perfect structure of delicate, diamond-sheeted wafers between the chocolate and peanut butter that these little dotted crispies never really had a chance. It just ends up tasting like it could be literally any ice cream brand’s generic crunch bar varietal.

So, I’d recommend these as an ice cream bar on their own, but not as a version of the Nutty Bar. The flavors just don’t pop enough. Whereas I actually think they did a great job on the cereal’s texture, these just never really get to where I wanted them to.

The collabs between Deb and the Hudsonville ice cream company seem to be going strong, so maybe they can go back to the lab and remix the flavors a bit. Just release them again as “Nutty Buddy Ice Cream Bars” in a few months and really mess with my head.

Purchased Price: $4.48
Size: 4 pack
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 Bar) 210 calories, 13 grams of fat, 9 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 20 milligrams of cholesterol, 55 milligrams of sodium, 19 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 15 grams of sugar, and 3 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Dunkin’ Breakfast Taco

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I think we’ve all gotten a little sloppy with our fast food naming conventions. Put something inside a tortilla shell and we’ll call it a taco. That’s pretty much what I was expecting from Dunkin’s new “Spring” item, the Breakfast Taco. I figured it would just be some eggs, cheese, maybe a little bacon, and…wait, Dunkin’ already makes that. It’s called the Wake-up Wrap, and it’s been on the menu for ages.

I was concerned: Was it possible that Dunkin’ was relaunching almost the exact same product under a different name? Who do they think they are, Taco Bell?

But no, Dunkin’ made something that’s not only different from its other offerings but hard to find anywhere in fast food breakfast land: a taco with a flavor profile that bespeaks its Mexican origins.

First, there are two versions: plain or with a bacon topping. I wanted to actually taste all of the subtle flavors without having to deal with that overbearing bacon flavor, so I went with the first option.

The taco starts with corn. Dunkin’ calls it “fire-roasted corn,” but it didn’t taste particularly roasted to me; it was just a pleasant, sweet flavor. Not overly sweet or syrupy, but just the natural sweetness of the vegetable. At first, the corn was so dominant that it was hard to discern the other flavors, but it’s a dish with surprising depth. I noticed more subtle flavor notes as I ate, which is an experience I don’t often get with breakfast food.

One of those subtle flavors is from the jalapenos. I need to be clear that this is not a very spicy item; the heat is mild and just quietly adds depth. Sometimes, when I make curry for dinner, I make it with only a smidgen of spices so that my spice-timid 7-year-old will eat it. That’s the kind of heat level this is: you know it’s there, and that’s enough.

I also picked out the herbaceous bite of cilantro, which adds a lot of brightness. More prominent is the melted sharp white cheddar cheese, which adds a dairy tang to the proceedings. It isn’t noticeable in every bite but offers a nice, salty contrast when it pops up.

Lastly, there is a “tangy” lime crema, but I only really tasted it at the very end of the taco, when all I had left was crema and a little tortilla. It could have just been my taco, or maybe the crema is another ingredient that is meant to be subtle.

Dunkin’ could have bunted the ball here and just made glorified scrambled eggs in a tortilla shell, but it went the extra mile and is offering customers a novel experience, not just different from other Dunkin’ menu items but different, period. Will it win out over more cheesy, eggy, bready foods in my personal breakfast rotation? Maybe. While I may not order it every time I go to Dunkin’, I’m really glad the option is there. I take my hat off to Dunkin’ for trying something new.

Purchased Price: $2.59
Rating: 9 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 180 calories, 9 grams of fat, 4 grams of saturated fat, 100 milligrams of cholesterol, 500 milligrams of sodium, 17 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 2 grams of sugar, and 8 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Girl Scouts Raspberry Rally Cookies

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There’s a common misconception that, as the father of a Girl Scout (Brownie, technically), I am privy to cookie discounts. This is patently false. In fact, what ACTUALLY happens is that I end up having to buy more cookies than just about anyone else. Here’s how that transpires.

“Dad, I’m only ten boxes away from the next prize.”

“Which is?”

“At 100 boxes, I get a glow-in-the-dark cup.”

So I sigh, pull out my wallet, and fork over the whatever-amount-needed to ensure that she can obtain what theoretically amounts to a $600 plastic cup.

The good news is that Girl Scout cookies are wonderful. Well, some of them. Peanut Butter Patties (aka Tagalongs), Caramel deLites (aka Samoas), and Thin Mints are all excellent selections, obviously, and there are others that will do in a pinch. It is from the Thin Mint that ABC Bakers draws inspiration for its latest offering: the Raspberry Rally.

Marketed as “the thin, crispy cookie infused with raspberry flavor and dipped in chocolaty coating,” and “a ‘sister’ cookie to Thin Mints, our #1 bestseller,” “the raspberry kind,” as it is sure to nearly always be called, is an online only offering this Girl Scout cookie season.

So is it worth it?

If you like raspberry-flavored things, or the concept of a Thin Mint but inexplicably find mint to be disagreeable, the answer is yes, you’ll probably like this cookie.

The cookie itself is indistinguishable in appearance and construct from its minty sister. The outside of the thin cookie is the slightly waxy (yet delicious) “chocolaty” coating that you will recognize if you’re a connoisseur of Girl Scout cookies.

The inside, however, is where things get crazy. Instead of the near-black wafer of a Thin Mint, you’re blasted with a vivid pink middle. The artificial raspberry flavor is strong upon the first bite and grows stronger still as you consume. It’s almost *too* much, and I say this as an unapologetic fan of most artificial fruit flavoring.

And really, that’s the tale of the Raspberry Rally — it is a Thin Mint, only raspberry flavored. Very strong raspberry flavoring, though. It’s worth a go if you like fruity chocolate cookies or are a Girl Scout cookie completist, but I don’t know that I’ll feel compelled to buy an entire box each season. You know, unless it means my daughter is only one box away from a $300 eraser in the shape of a bee.

Purchased Price: $6.00
Size: 9 oz box
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (4 cookies) 160 calories, 8 grams of total fat, 5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 90 milligrams of sodium, 21 grams of total carbs, 1 gram of dietary fiber, 10 grams of total sugar, and 2 gram of protein.

REVIEW: McDonald’s New Lemonade (2023)

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Sweet, tart, refreshing… lemonade is so popular for a reason, sure. But it can also be pretty easy to mess up. In ye olden days of about a few weeks ago, back when McDonald’s used to serve syrupy Minute Maid lemonade, it wasn’t exactly the nectar of the gods, but it was predictable. The Minute Maid has now been replaced by McDonald’s new lemonade (ironically referred to on its menu as “classic”), which was an unknown quantity for me.

To briefly break down the difference, this new brew is described by Mickey D’s as “made with real lemon juice, bits of lemon pulp and real cane sugar.” Conversely, Minute Maid is maid with high fructose corn syrup instead of sugar, and it also doesn’t contain pulp. So, these two citrusy sips have their distinctions, and you can taste them.

I was a little concerned that I wouldn’t be able to find the words to review something as straightforward as lemonade, but from my very first taste, one word flashed brightly in my mind, as bold as Ronald McDonald’s wig: TART. I had wondered whether this new lemonade might be on the saccharine side like its predecessor, but there was nothing mild about its lip-puckering intensity. That cane sugar does lend some welcome notes of sweetness to avoid feeling like you’re straight up licking a lemon, but the dominant flavor is definitely sour.

I had also suspected that this lemonade might taste watered down, but I’m pleased to report that that was not the case. The taste was rather smooth and robust, so much so that when I had to take a phone call mid review and returned to find my ice cubes melted, the flavor was hardly diminished (in fact, with the sharp edges of sourness slightly toned down the lemonade might have even tasted better).

Of course, I also have to mention the potentially-controversial addition of pulp, and I have to mention that I barely noticed it. The pulp was most obvious when I peered at the bottom of my cup, and yes, when I jostled the cup I could clearly see it swirling throughout, but its presence was less felt in the taste, with most pulp bits short and thin enough that I hardly realized they were there as I drank. The occasional larger chunk was more apparent, but I found that these just added some welcome texture.

Overall, the potent pucker power of McDonald’s new lemonade might be a touch too tart for some tastes, but if you can suck it up — literally! — this juice is worth the squeeze.

Purchased Price: $2.60
Size: Small
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 150 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 10 milligrams of sodium, 37 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 34 grams of sugar (including 34 grams of added sugar), and 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Limited Edition Frosted Lemon Cheerios

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As the Northern hemisphere thaws from an icy winter and we drag our allergy-ridden behinds to the grocery store, a fresh ray of hope meets us — Spring Flavored Stuff.

Ah, seasonal flavors, you tasty little tropes. Pumpkin spice might have a choke hold on the fall, but which flavor will prevail to rule the spring? Carrots have tried, but they taste like nothing. For a moment, I thought this would be the Age of Raspberry, but it seemed that was a Valentine’s red flash in the pan. Therefore, I would like to present my case for lemon. The Year of Lemon is upon us. Will this drastically underrated flavor finally prevail? Cheerios is willing to find out with its new Frosted Lemon variety.

The delicate aromas of lemon and sugar are the first to meet my senses. Yep, smells like lemon. I was also pleased to see no signs of yellow color, natural or otherwise. Cheerios kept it au naturel in the appearance department. If you put these next to standard Frosted Cheerios, I don’t think I’d be able to pinpoint which one was which just by looking at them. The lemon scent is delightful and suggests they won’t be too strong.

Digging into a bowl prepared with 2% milk, I’m immediately reminded of Fruit Loops. Only these are a better, more sophisticated version. Think Fruit Loops’ older cousin who sometimes buys them alcohol. The lemon is not at all overwhelming. In fact, I wouldn’t mind if it was a bit stronger. The flavor is citrusy and sweet, reminiscent of a lemon cookie or lemon cake, but not too sweet. I should note that there is no actual lemon in the ingredient line here. It’s just a perfectly chosen and mindfully balanced natural lemon flavor. Hats off to you, Big G. These are great.

I also gave these a whirl as the topping for my fruit and yogurt breakfast. The lemon flavor gets lost easily in this application, so I’d stick to your standard milk and cereal preparation to get the full effect.

Overall, this seasonal variety is well done. The lemon is fresh, bright, and not overpowering. It’s a great way to start or end your day and a fine introduction to The Year of Lemon (please let this catch and become an actual thing).

Purchased Price: $5.99
Size: 14.7 oz box
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 cup without milk) 140 calories, 1.5 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 150 milligrams of sodium, 29 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of fiber, 11 grams of sugar (including 11 grams of added sugar), and 3 grams of protein.

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