REVIEW: Snoop Cereal (Fruity Hoopz, Cinnamon Toasteez, and Frosted Drizzlerz)

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Are you a fan of rap music and/or the classic recipe book “From Crook to Cook”? Do you want your breakfast cereal to serve a charitable mission? Or are you just tired of seeing toucans and wacky anthropomorphic amalgamations of various food products have all the mascot fun? If you’ve answered yes to any of those questions, you might want to check out the three new flavors of Snoop Cereal (and if you’ve answered yes to all of them, wow, you have really specific tastes).

As the name suggests, these cereals and the colorful animal characters that tout them were indeed created by Snoop Dogg (and Master P, in a collaboration between their Broadus Foods brand and Post), and they even have lyrics on the boxes to match. But what’s more interesting is that proceeds from each purchase are donated to charities that help homeless families and fight food insecurity.

How are they, though? Well… let’s just say that if you’ve ever consumed a sugary cereal before, my findings probably won’t surprise you…

Fruity Hoopz with Marshmallows

At first glance, this “sweetened multigrain cereal” looks just like Froot Loops. On second and third and fourth glance, it does too… so, okay, you’ll probably be familiar with what you’re getting into. I thought maybe the loops looked a bit thicker than I expected, but that didn’t impact the eating experience much. You’ll smell them before you taste them, a fruity, cloying perfume that perfectly foreshadows the sugar-glazed, slightly floral burst of crunchy sweetness to come.

The most “unique” element here (if it can even be called that) would be the marbits, of which I was lucky to find about one per generous spoonful, but at the risk of sounding like a broken record, they are also not super revolutionary. Again, they seemed to me a bit larger than what other cereals like Lucky Charms provide, but they have that same eminently chompable texture, soft yet with an audible crack after you bite down and before they melt pleasantly and cotton-candy-ishly in your mouth. I prefer my cereal with milk and found that these left the milk with a delightful syrupy sweet flavor, but after intending to eat just a few dry pieces, I (perhaps predictably) had a lot of trouble stopping, so you can’t go wrong either way.

Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 1/3 cup) 150 calories, 1 gram of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 160 milligrams of sodium, 34 grams of carbohydrates, 19 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein

Cinnamon Toasteez

This may be obvious just from the box, but I couldn’t find a huge difference between this “sweetened crispy wheat and rice cereal” and Cinnamon Toast Crunch, both appearance-wise and flavor-wise. A few of the pieces I had were extra cinnamon-studded, with stripes closer to black than brown and a slightly more potent taste, but these are mostly just sweet with a vague air of cinnamon-y-ness. I think the OG Cinnamon Toast Crunch tastes a bit more of actual cinnamon and therefore is a bit better, but unless you’re particularly picky, this should definitely make a more-than-serviceable substitute.

It’s also neat that, ranging as they do from lightly wavy to practically bent in two, the pieces aren’t perfectly square, giving them extra texture and dimension, and some are studded with air bubbles that contrast the general brittleness well. Their flat shape also allows a cool crispiness when sampled straight from the box, though I found these just as appealing when they were soggy with milk. But strangely, while the cinnamon dust became very visible in the milk that collected at the bottom of my bowl, it didn’t seem to affect its flavor whatsoever, so that was a bit of a bummer.

Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 cup) 180 calories, 5 grams of fat, 0.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 210 milligrams of sodium, 32 grams of carbohydrates, 14 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.

Frosted Drizzlers

This “sweetened, crunchy, frosted whole grain wheat cereal” seemed the most novel to me, but that’s probably just because I don’t eat a ton of its doppelganger, Frosted Mini Wheats. (And probably also because, I’ll confess, when I purchased them, my brain only really registered the word “Frosted,” so I expected something… flakier.) Like the Hoopz, these pieces seemed unusually but not unpleasantly jumbo-sized; I couldn’t tell if they were longer than your typical pillow of shredded wheat cereal, but they certainly seemed thicker.

This is the cereal where I felt milk made the biggest difference for the better. Despite a generous dusting of sugar, the strong wheat flavor and bristly texture pretty thoroughly outweighed any hints of sweetness when eaten dry, but they tasted noticeably nicer when soaked in milk. This flavor was decent, but something about eating an easily countable number of ginormous pieces instead of the seemingly infinite number of tiny pieces that other cereals tend to offer just feels less fun. Plus, I couldn’t quite shake the feeling that I was chewing on a bunch of tiny wicker baskets. Oh, and these produced an even more flavorless milk than the Cinnamon Toasteez.

Rating: 5 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (21 biscuits) 210 calories, 1 gram of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 5 milligrams of sodium, 50 grams of carbohydrates, 12 grams of sugar, and 5 grams of protein.

These cereals are tasty, if unlikely to be anything you haven’t seen or snacked on before. You won’t miss much if you don’t try them, but hey, knowing that your sugar rush comes with a side of helping those in need is pretty sweet.

Purchased Price: $3.29
Size: 12 oz box (Fruity Hoopz and Cinnamon Toasteez), 18 oz box (Frosted Drizzlerz)
Purchased at: Target

REVIEW: Pillsbury Banana Bread Batter

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You’ve been there. It’s Saturday, and you want banana bread, but all of your bananas are green! Rats! There’s no way to rapid-ripen them, so what do you do?! Boy oh Pillsbury doughboy, does General Mills have a solution for you with its new ready-to-bake Banana Bread Batter.

Okay, maybe that scenario isn’t very realistic, but thankfully this banana bread batter is. It’s also kind of hilarious. I don’t know why a bladder bag full of bread batter is so funny, except to say that a tube of goo will always garner a giggle. The product is pretty straightforward. You simply spray a loaf pan with non-stick spray, squeeze the batter goo into the pan, try not to eat all the goo instantly because, for some inexplicable reason, this batter tastes better than most cookie doughs you’ve tried, and then bake.

The batter needs a little assistance getting into all the corners of the pan, so you need to smooth it out a bit. No big deal, and so far, this is the most effort I’ve put into the entire process aside from cutting off the bag’s tip. The first time I made this, I ignored the step in the instructions to let the batter sit out at room temperature for 15 minutes before baking. Instead, I squeezed it out immediately after removing it from the fridge and baked it for the 60-minute recommended bake time.

When I did this, I baked the joy straight out of it. It was way overdone, had developed a thick bottom crust, was pretty dry, and lacked flavor. I was super disappointed, but it turned out the way it did because of user error. It’s reasonable to expect that a loaf of bread that needs to be baked for an hour should be checked on at around 50 minutes or so. Also, the batter tasted so good that I had to try again. I have to give you all an honest review experience!

I picked up another tube of goo to redeem myself! This time I let it sit on the counter for 15 minutes before squeezing the batter into my greased loaf pan. I also decided to add mini chocolate chips because, well, morsels. I reduced the baking time to 50 minutes and checked the loaf with a toothpick for doneness. This second attempt was an enormous success. This banana bread has a natural banana flavor that is not overpowering. The texture is fluffy, almost like a cake. I would say, as compared to homemade banana bread, most homemade recipes are far more moist and sticky dense. But for how quick and easy this is (assuming you don’t have to do it twice because I did that for you), it’s pretty good! It scratches an itch!

Overall I’d say Pillsbury’s Banana Bread Batter is unique and absurdly convenient for a consumer need that I’m not entirely certain exists. But it sticks the landing with a fluffy, tasty cake bread ending. I would suggest adding mix-ins like chocolate chips, walnuts, or maybe even another real banana to jazz it up a little.

Purchased Price: $6.49
Size: 30 oz log (makes 1 loaf)
Purchased at: Mariano’s (Kroger)
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1/15 of a loaf) 190 calories, 6 grams of fat, 2.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 20 milligrams of cholesterol, 200 milligrams of sodium, 32 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 17 grams of sugar (including 14 grams of added sugar), and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Campfire Smores M&M’s

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Many Halloween and/or campfire stories talk about something coming back from the dead. And that’s what we have here with these new Campfire Smores M&M’s.

There was a s’mores variety back in 2016, but that one had a crispy center.

This 2023 edition, on the other hand, has a milk chocolate center with a layer of white chocolate. The s’mores aspect comes from artificial flavoring. Oh, and now the folks at Mars (not to be confused with the folks on Mars) have dropped the apostrophe in smores, and they have decided that smores are for fall/Halloween instead of summer.

(In fairness, though, I’m reviewing these in July, so the summer connection still applies. There was even a pool toy on the Walmart display of Halloween M&M’s.)

At first, I wondered why the crunchy texture that evoked graham crackers was dropped. But after tasting the M&M’s, I’m not even mad. It turns out this back-from-the-dead flavor is not scary after all! They really do taste like smores. The chocolate comes from chocolate, obviously, but I also taste graham. I’m not sure if I detect marshmallow, but then again, marshmallows don’t even have much of a flavor. Texture-wise, it seems the M&M’s are going for the gooey part of the smore rather than the crunchy part, as evidenced by the gooey chocolate in the “Smores” branding.

I also enjoy the orange, black, and white color scheme, which screams Halloween, more than the orange, purple, and green “Ghoul’s Mix” of the standard flavors. The colors also evoke those of a smore, provided you use bright-orange graham crackers. (Make it happen, Honey Maid!)

In past years here at TIB, I have reviewed other Halloween M&M’s of dubious relevance — Cookies and Screeem and Creepy Cocoa Crisp. I like these better than the CaS, but not as much as the CCC.

Oh, and I compared the prices and sizes for the previous seasonal M&Ms. In 2017 and 2019, they were $3.19 for an 8-ounce bag. In 2023, they’re $3.96 for a 7.44-ounce bag.

Shrinkflation is the real monster in this scary story.

Purchased Price: $3.96
Size: 7.44 oz. bag
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (28 grams/about 16 pieces) 140 calories, 6 grams of fat, 4 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, less than 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 25 milligrams of sodium, 20 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of dietary fiber, 18 grams of sugar including 17 grams added sugar, and 1 gram of protein.

Click here to read our previous M&M’s reviews.

REVIEW: Sonic Aloha Tropical Colada Slush

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I’ve been on a slush kick since Free Slurpee Day at 7-Eleven.

It was the first slush-style drink I’d had in what felt like years, and something inside of me reawakened. I made up for that lost time in rapid fashion. Wawa hit me with a surprise free ICEE reward, which I immediately cashed in on. I had a few unearned pina coladas, grabbed a slushie with an otherwise gross McDonald’s dinner, and I’ve gone back to 7-Eleven two times since. Needless to say, I’ve been overdoing it.

In my defense, it’s basically the hottest summer ever, but I do need to nip this in the bud now before it gets out of hand. I don’t wanna get addicted to these sugar bombs, so here I am, vowing to return to a slush-less life… as soon as I try Sonic’s new Tropical Colada Slush.

What you’re looking at here is basically a pina colada sans rum – Sonic’s version of a mocktail.

Pineapple, coconut, and banana are arguably my three favorite fruits, and as far as I’m concerned, three flavors that usually blend together perfectly. Usually.

A pina colada with the added banana flavor sounds incredible, but something here just didn’t jive. The Tropical Colada Slush is good, but I really wanted it to be amazing.

This is very pineapple-forward. It dominates the flavor, especially for the first few sips, which I think gave me a brain freeze in world record timing. The Guinness Book later confirmed my claim, but bluntly stated, “No one cares, bro.”

After a few sips, I started to notice a little banana peeking through, which mellowed the sharper pineapple flavor. The real surprise of this slush was how lowkey the coconut was. I don’t like when coconut is so strong you think you’re drinking suntan lotion, but I needed the flavor ramped up about 60% here.

Ultimately it was refreshing, but the recipe needs a tweak. I love Sonic ice, which is closer to a Slush Puppy than a Slurpee, but with this flavor profile, I think I would have preferred the fluffier 7-Eleven style. This thing is dense.

I’m a bit bummed overall for the lack of coconut, but mostly for how soft the banana flavor was. It’s so rare to get something like this with banana. I almost wish I could’ve tried it without the pineapple entirely. Still, I think this scratched my banana itch —- and yes, that does sound awful. I apologize for writing those words.

I wanted this to be the best slush I’ve ever had. Instead, it was only okay. It hit the spot on another 95-degree day at least.

I’d recommend asking for an extra shot of banana if possible. I noticed you could add a shot of blue coconut syrup, which might also be a good idea to counteract the pineapple. As an added bonus, it’ll probably make the slush a satisfying sky-blue color instead of the nondescript off-white.

I’d say give this a try, but go during happy hour and get it for half price. Just be careful, though, because slush drinks can be very addictive.

Purchased Price: $2.99
Size: Medium
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 270 calories, 0 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 45 milligrams of sodium, 73 grams of carbohydrates, 72 grams of sugar, and 0 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Carmella Creeper Monster Cereal

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I love the green color of the whole grain corn pieces in the Carmella Creeper Monster Cereal. It screams zombies as loud as someone screaming because zombies are eating them. The newest Monster Cereal is caramel apple flavored, and like all other Monster Cereals, it comes with marshmallows.

After sticking my snout into the pouch, I noticed a sweet artificial caramel aroma, but my sniffer detected no apple. I don’t know if I’m tired of smelling the other Monster varieties, but I found the scent to be more inviting than the others.

While I didn’t notice any apple with its aroma, it does make an appearance when I eat the spooky cereal. The pleasant caramel green apple flavor isn’t bold, but it’s enough to perk up my taste buds, and the marshmallows enhance the sweetness of every spoonful. However, that’s when it’s eaten dry. When I consumed it the way the Breakfast Gods intended it to be eaten, with milk, the sweet and fruity flavors were less noticeable. Also, the milk at the bottom of the bowl had a very faint apple caramel taste.

I’m a bit disappointed that the flavors didn’t stand out as much as they do with this recent General Mills cinnamon apple cereal, but, overall, I like this and it’s now my second favorite Monster Cereal, right behind Count Chocula. Although full disclosure, I’ve always thought Boo Berry and Franken Berry were mediocre, and Fruit Brute was okay (waiting to be pelted by hard stale cereal marshmallows over the internet).

Now, after virtually throwing marshmallows at me, you might be wondering who Carmella Creeper is. Well, the cereal box explains most of it. She’s a DJ, the first female Monster to have a cereal, and Franken Berry’s long lost zombie cousin. Now you might be thinking, “How is she related to Franken Berry if he’s not a zombie?”

Well, I sat down and thought about it more than any normal human being should and wasted many minutes of my life I’ll never get back. Here’s my theory. Let’s say Franken Berry is the son of two Franken monsters, and as we all know, Franken monsters are made using various body parts. So I think one of Franken Berry’s parents has a Franken sibling with a body part from someone related to Carmella. So that equals to being cousins in the monster world. I think.

Okay, maybe that’s a stretch, and it’s something simple like a Franken monster and zombie marriage happened. But what’s not a stretch is that Carmella Creeper Cereal is a tasty addition to the Monster Cereals line.

DISCLOSURE: I received a free product sample from General Mills. Doing so did not influence my review.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 9.3 oz box
Purchased at: Received from General Mills
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 1/3 cup w/o milk) 160 calories, 1.5 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 190 milligrams of sodium, 36 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 11 grams of sugar (including 11 grams of added sugar), and 2 grams of protein.

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