REVIEW: Ben & Jerry’s Impretzively Fudged and PB S’more

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Kicking off the new year in sweet and salty style, the master churners at Ben & Jerry’s are back with two fresh additions to their vaunted lineup of chunk-laden pints: Impretzively Fudged and PB S’more.

Impretzively Fudged is chocolate ice cream with fudge-covered pretzel pieces and pretzel swirls.

This is a straightforward but delightfully effective take on a chocolate-covered pretzel. Simple isn’t always bad; in this case, it makes the pint simply stunning. The chocolate base is as good as ever, with some of the salt from the pretzel swirl bleeding into the ice cream for a more nuanced and rich chocolate flavor than the average chocolate provides — and I love it. The gritty, subtly crunchy pretzel swirl is pretty present throughout, and with only one swirl and one mix-in, the intended sweet and salty profile is inescapable and captivatingly delicious.

The fudge-covered pretzel pieces are different than I expected. Even though the description says “pieces,” I envisioned pretzel nuggets, but they are, in fact, pieces. Pieces to the point that they feel almost like shattered fragments of a chocolate pretzel bark. They have a nice crunch and genuine salty pop that makes each spoonful incredibly satisfying. This pint eats more like a chocolate chip ice cream than one with massive boulders of chunk-age, but in this case, the chocolate chips are flecks of chocolate pretzel, and it’s pure indulgent fun. The profile is a bit of a one-trick pony, but it’s a pony that I love and a trick I will gladly embrace time and time again.

PB S’more is toasted marshmallow ice cream with peanut butter cups, graham cracker pieces, and marshmallow swirls.

S’mores ice cream is usually hard to pull off, nailing the nuanced layers of flavor and texture that make the summertime treat so fantastic, and this new PB-ified iteration falls down that same tricky trajectory. Anytime I see marshmallow and graham swirls in an ice cream, I am sold, and they both do their job in this pint convincingly as some of B&J’s best mix-ins. Where it gets a bit muddied is in the toasted marshmallow base. It comes across as really sweet, and I love sweet, but this teeters on cloying. Not enough to ruin the experience, but enough to make me wish it was different. I don’t get much of a toasted flavor either, and some smokiness would have been more than welcome to temper the intense sweetness of the base and swirls.

The peanut butter cups change the pint’s dynamic for the better, bringing a big, bold crunch and semisweet chocolate punch that helps break up the overlapping monotony of the double-mallow-whammy. They are full-sized PB cups broken into giant chunks. But sadly, my pint only had four sizable pieces throughout with a couple of fragmented shards, and I only occasionally got the salty peanut butter reprieve I was hoping for. I love this flavor conceptually, but in execution, I think it would have been much better with a different base — graham, peanut butter, or even chocolate — to make the scoop more balanced in moments without the excellent boulders of PB cups.

All in all, these are fun ways to start the new year for one of the most prolific brands in grocery store ice cream. This drop steps away from the novelty of a Topped or Core’d pint to deliver a slightly tweaked version of Gimme S’more and a more bare-bones spin on Glampfire Trail Mix. If you’re a fan of those, this will likely appeal to you and should be arriving on shelves now!

DISCLOSURE: I received free product samples from Ben & Jerry’s. Doing so did not influence my review.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: One Pint
Rating: 9 out of 10 (Impretzively Fudged), 7 out of 10 (PB S’more)
Nutrition Facts: (2/3 cup) Impretzively Fudged – 390 calories, 23 grams of fat, 14 grams of saturated fat, 0.5 grams of trans fat, 50 milligrams of cholesterol, 260 milligrams of sodium, 42 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of fiber, 32 grams of total sugars, and 6 grams of protein. PB S’more – 370 calories, 19 grams of fat, 12 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 55 milligrams of cholesterol, 120 milligrams of sodium, 45 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, 35 grams of total sugars, and 6 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Peanut Butter Oreo Cakesters (2024)

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What is a Cakester exactly? Is it:

A. a baker of sweets?
B. a name that 90’s bullies would yell at portly children?
C. a soft-baked Oreo cookie?
D. a portmanteau of “cake” and “gangster?”

If you guessed “D,” you are correct. “Cakesters” are lackeys in the cake mafia. You might know them as the “Slob Mob.” Cakesters work under the Don who goes by the name “Cake Boss.” Yeah, I’m on to you, Valastro. That man is NOT our Buddy. When you hear him talking about “icing,” it ain’t about fondant.

Alright, if you guessed “C,” you’re also right, but now you know the clear inspiration for the name.

Oreo Cakesters came back in 2022, and now the peanut butter flavored crème version has returned. These are essentially just snack cakes with an Oreo nametag. They’re built like Oreos but it’s an entirely different experience. I’ve never even really thought they tasted too much like Oreos. Honestly, these could have any snack cake branding, so you’re probably wondering if they stack up to the big dogs in the snack cake arena?

Yeah, I think these are right in line with Hostess, Drake’s, Tastykakes and Little Debbie.

They taste like a slightly worse patty-shaped version of my all-time favorite, the Devil Dog. I’ve always preferred a snack cake that isn’t slathered in a sheet of plasticized chocolate.

The cake is a little denser than the typical, but it’s good because it helps emulate an Oreo a little better that way. Flavor-wise, the chocolate tastes vaguely like Oreo wafers at best, but it’s still quality.

The peanut butter filling is very nice texturally. It’s not Oreo crème, it’s more whipped to better fit the snack cake norm. I guess part of me is always disappointed by that. I’d kinda like to try that gritty Oreo crème between two cakes, but I like this too.

Flavor-wise, I have to say the crème is a little too mild. There are some bites where you don’t even really register the peanut butter. It gets swallowed up by the chocolate cake.

I wanted the peanut butter to punch me in the face like one of Buddy’s Cakesters when you don’t have his flour. (That’s what they call money… and also flour. It gets confusing.)

Here’s the thing though, peanut butter crème snack cakes tend to lean toward a synthetic pb flavor. Think of Funny Bones as an example – I’ve never been a huge fan of that peanut butter, and I feel like that’s the standard. These are better than Funny Bones.

Ultimately, I think original Cakesters are superior to these, but I probably like these a little better than regular overrated Peanut Butter Oreos. They’re satisfying if not a little boring, but still well worth a purchase. Peanut Butter Cakesters basically land smack in the middle of the entire Oreo product scale AND the snack cake scale.

Speaking of scales, I don’t wanna sleep with the fishes, so if you’re reading this, I was just messing around earlier, Mr. Valastro.

Purchased Price: $4.19
Size: 10.1 oz package (5 2.02 oz packs)
Purchased at: Shop Rite
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 Pack) 260 calories, 13 grams of fat, 5 grams of saturated fat, 0 gram of trans fat, 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 260 milligrams of sodium, 34 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 20 grams of sugar, and 4 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Goldfish Crisps

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There have been so many flavors of Goldfish Crackers that it becomes difficult to pinpoint at any one time exactly how many are actively on the market. But there are only THREE types of Goldfish CRISPS, and that’s easier to figure out because they’re brand new, baby!

When I think of Goldfish crackers, my mind immediately goes to the classic cheddar flavor, the little orange smiley guys that are delightfully cheesy. I decided to try the cheddar flavor Goldfish Crisps first in homage. The Goldfish Crisps’ main difference from classic Goldfish Crackers is their texture. These are very light and puffy and certainly live up to the crisp namesake. They have a slightly sweet, very mild base and leave it to the seasoning powder to do the heavy lifting on flavor. The cheddar seasoning powder is pretty tasty and just salty enough to keep you coming back for return bites.

I was surprised, however, at the lack of cheesy flavor in the base until I looked it up and realized that Original Goldfish Crackers are also devoid of cheese. My bad, Pepperidge Farm! The Goldfish Crisp base seems much closer to the Original Goldfish Cracker base in flavor, but it is potato-based and contains whey. The crispy texture reminds me of Quest Protein chips, but these are much better and not as mouth drying.

My fingers dove into the schools of Salt & Vinegar and Sour Cream & Onion Goldfish Crisps next. I’ll admit I’m not an enormous salt and vinegar fan, but these seemed particularly off base. Because the base crisp has a slight sweetness, they just tasted like salt & vinegar club crackers. The vinegar flavor was way too strong, and I found it easy to stop eating them. Another thing I noticed was that all Goldfish crisps are devoid of the characteristic Goldfish Cracker “smile.” Not to worry, though, I wasn’t smiling at the salt & vinegar flavor, so I didn’t care that they weren’t smiling back.

The sour cream & onion variety, on the other hand, was downright addictive. The seasoning blend on these Goldfish Crisps was super delicious, like any classic sour cream & onion chip. They were generously seasoned (an extreme case shown below!), which added to the enjoyment. They reminded me of homemade ranch-seasoned oyster crackers. In fact, ranch would be a great line extension if anyone at Big Pepperidge happens to be reading.

Overall, I’m pretty impressed by the new Goldfish Crisps. If you assume Goldfish’s base snack business is largely aimed at children, these seem designed for an older consumer. They mean business with their strong flavor and fishy faces devoid of emotion. I’d certainly try the sour cream & onion again, in particular.

Purchased Price: $3.99 each
Size: 6.25 oz bag
Purchased at: Jewel Osco
Rating: Cheddar (7 out of 10), Salt & Vinegar (5 out of 10), Sour Cream & Onion (9 out of 10)
Nutrition Facts: Per Serving (44 pieces) Cheddar 140 Calories, 6 grams of fat, 1 gram of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 250 milligrams of sodium, 20 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 3 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein. Salt & Vinegar – 140 Calories, 6 grams of fat, 0.5 gram of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 250 milligrams of sodium, 20 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 3 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein. Sour Cream & Onion – 140 Calories, 6 grams of fat, 1 gram of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 240 milligrams of sodium, 19 grams of carbohydrates, 1 gram of fiber, 3 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Berry Swirl Lucky Charms Cereal

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Skittles encourages you to “Taste the Rainbow.” But when I look at Berry Swirl Lucky Charms Cereal, I can’t help but think I’m about to taste the rainbow that leads to a pool of 64 melted Crayola crayons on top of a Bob Ross paint palette. I could give you a rundown of all the colors I see, but staring at it hurts my eyes. Also, I’m pretty sure if I look at it long enough, a 3D image will pop out.

Those of you who have ridden the rainbow of Lucky Charms varieties probably have Fruity Lucky Charms at the front of your mind, which was the usual marshmallows with red-colored, fruity-flavored cereal pieces. Berry Swirl Lucky Charms takes the color and fruity taste up a notch with different colored fruity cereal and berry-flavored marshmallows. Of course, the obligatory green clovers, pink hearts, yellow stars, blue moons, purple horseshoes, red balloons, rainbows, and unicorns are also in the mix.

Much like other fruity cereals, all the corn pieces taste the same regardless of color and have a nondescript fruitiness. While there’s a decent number of blueberry and raspberry-flavored marshmallows, the amount is dwarfed by the bright cereal pieces and standard marbits, making the new berry marshmallows indistinguishable from the rest of the cereal. Eating them on their own is the only way to taste their respective flavors. It’s disappointing that all the marbits weren’t the berry ones because I think that might’ve made this a marbit more interesting than it is. But Lucky Charms gotta Lucky Charms and have the usual sugary stalwarts.

Berry Swirl Lucky Charms will satisfy fruity cereal fans, and it’s a good part of a complete breakfast. However, because the berry marshmallows don’t add anything, it’s not better or more intriguing than any other fruity cereal with marbits. But it’s definitely the most colorful.

DISCLOSURE: I received a free product sample from General Mills. Doing so did not influence my review.

Purchased Price: FREE
Size: 10.9 oz box
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 cup – cereal only) 140 calories, 1.5 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 210 milligrams of sodium, 31 grams of carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 12 grams of sugar (including 12 grams of added sugar), and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Cinnamon Toast Crunch, Cocoa Puffs, and Trix Loaded Cereals

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In my last review on this very site, a review for a healthy cereal, I made fun of “the new Trix that is stuffed with frosting.” And while I am still enjoying my box of Cheerios Loaded with Nuts, when I saw the new General Mills Loaded Cereals on the shelf, I laughed and figured “in for a penny, in for a pound.” Wait, no, that’s not it. When in Rome? Whatever doesn’t kill me only makes me stronger? Maybe that one. Because the jaw-rattling sweetness on these new Krave knock-offs is enough to kill me. (Or at least leave me in mild discomfort.)

All three varieties — Trix, Cocoa Puffs, and Cinnamon Toast Crunch — are squared puffs filled with “vanilla creme.” The image on the box promises a creme that will decadently ooze from each piece. In what is probably a quite obvious development, this doesn’t happen. Despite this structural design flaw, is this cereal worth buying? Let’s dig in.

Trix Loaded

The world’s foremost cereal mascotted by a deranged woodland creature tastes the most like its forebearer. When you first pop one into your mouth, you get the unmistakable artificial fruit taste of Trix. As you bite in, however, you get the vanilla creme, which tastes like sweet. That’s right, it tastes like sweet. There is no discernible vanilla flavor; it tastes, in fact, like someone managed to stuff a piece of the outer shell from a Little Debbies Zebra Cake into the inside of a Trix. That doesn’t sound appealing, necessarily, but it’s better than you might think. This was the best of the three.

Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 cup) 180 calories, 6 grams of fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 110 milligrams of sodium, 32 grams of carbohydrates, 2 gram of fiber, 12 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.

Cocoa Puffs Loaded

Like the Trix version, this one tasted quite a bit like the cereal from which it was born. And while the concept of a vanilla filling seems like it would be an excellent compliment to a chocolate cereal, something about it just didn’t seem to click as well. I noticed the aggressive sweetness of the filling more with this one, I think, which was a detraction. After a few spoonfuls, I realized I probably didn’t need to try this one again.

Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 cup) 180 calories, 6 grams of fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 130 milligrams of sodium, 31 grams of carbohydrates, 2 gram of fiber, 12 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch Loaded

This was the biggest disappointment of the group. First of all, CTC is the best cereal in General Mills’ catalogue, and maybe even the best cereal ever. Second, the idea of adding FROSTING to a cereal flavored like cinnamon toast sort of makes you think this would strongly evoke a cinnamon roll itself, right? Well, it doesn’t. Part of what makes CTC so good is the almost extreme amount of Cinnadusting on each heavenly square. These Loaded pillows have but a FRACTION of the namesake’s powder. On every fifth piece you go, oh, right, cinnamon; but by and large, these things are tasteless. Well, except for the overbearing “sweet” from the filling. Like a grandmother meeting Tom Selleck at a Blue Bloods fan convention, it is loud and proud.

Rating: 4 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 cup) 180 calories, 6 grams of fat, 1.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 120 milligrams of sodium, 32 grams of carbohydrates, 2 gram of fiber, 12 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.

All three were purchased at Walmart for $4.93.

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