REVIEW: Coca-Cola Spiced

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I’m a fiend for flavored Coke. And by “flavored Coke,” I actually mean any cola jazzed up with something else, like Pepsi that is mangoed in nature, and yes, the flavored Cokes — most of them, anyway. I love Cherry and Vanilla Coca-Cola, and I am still mourning the departure of Orange Vanilla Coke. (That and the Cinnamon Coke it did at Christmas a few years ago. I’d do bad, illegal things to have Cinnamon Coke be a regular offering.)

I did not, however, care for many of the past couple of year’s “Mystery Flavors” from the Coca-Cola Creations line. You know, the abstract ones meant to taste like emotions and concepts or those designed by algorithms or famous DJs. There were a couple that were tolerable, but because there were far too many to begin with, they all blended together, and now I can’t remember which ones they were.

But I had high hopes for Coca-Cola Spiced because the flavoring seems pretty straightforward: “Raspberry Spiced (and other natural flavors).” Plus, on more than one occasion, I’ve opted for a Raspberry Coke from a Coke Freestyle machine, and I’ve never regretted it.

But make no mistake. This ain’t that, though.

My previously high hopes were dashed against the rocks immediately after cracking open the bottle.

A strong cough syrup scent overwhelmed me before the first fizzy sip ever touched my lips. Then I took a drink, and perhaps unsurprisingly, the cough syrup was front and center. Thankfully, it wasn’t as strong as the scent, but it was still very present, a medicinal bite that tasted only vaguely raspberrian in nature, right at the beginning of the drink. And while it mellowed slightly on the back end, it never fully went away.

Because I am a “Zero Sugar” guy, I tried both, and while it is worth noting that the Robitussin-esque qualities of Spiced were milder in the Zero version, they are still there, just muted. It made that version more tolerable, but still, nothing I’d actively seek out again.

So until Coca-Cola brings back Orange Vanilla or Cinnamon (or makes Vanilla Zero Sugar more ubiquitous so that I can buy it more often than “that one time I found it last summer while vacationing in Des Moines”), I’ll stick with the options that don’t immediately evoke memories of staying home from school with a bad cough.

Purchased Price: $2.69 each
Size: 20 oz bottles
Purchased at: QuikTrip
Rating: 4 out of 10 (Original), 5 out of 10 (Zero Sugar)
Nutrition Facts: (1 bottle) Original – 250 calories, 0 grams of fat, 50 milligrams of sodium, 67 grams of carbohydrates, 67 grams of sugar (including 67 grams of added sugar), 0 grams of protein, and 54 milligrams of caffeine. Zero Sugar – 0 calories, 0 grams of fat, 95 milligrams of sodium, 0 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of sugar, 0 grams of protein, and 57 milligrams of caffeine.

REVIEW: Jack in the Box Cinnamon Sugar Churro French Toast Sticks

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Jack in the Box’s Cinnamon Sugar Churro French Toast Sticks are a tasty way to start your morning, or because the menu item is available to order any time of day, they’re also a tasty way to begin or end an afternoon or evening.

The limited time offering features three or six French toast sticks dipped in sweet vanilla batter that are deep fried and then rolled in cinnamon sugar. It also comes with a container of syrup.

The description makes it sound delightful, but including “churro” in its name is kind of a stretch. I mean, deep fried and rolled in cinnamon sugar is almost the textbook definition of a churro, but part of the experience is its star shape. These look like Jack’s Classic French Toast Sticks, but maybe slightly darker. I’m not sure if adding “churro” was necessary because calling it Cinnamon Sugar French Toast Sticks would’ve excited me enough to try it over Jack’s Classic version. But I guess churro is the flavour du jour at the moment. (Also, pickle for some reason.)

These French toast sticks are as crispy as they look, but the interior is a bit dry. However, that dryness is less noticeable when they’re dipped into the provided syrup. While I enjoyed all three pieces, I wish they were rolled in cinnamon sugar longer, creating a thicker and sweeter sugary crust. The cinnamon sugar flavor is there, but I want it to stand out more to make these taste outstanding without some syrup, like an actual churro. Of course, that might be my sweet tooth doing all the talking.

But overall, they’re good enough that I’m kicking myself for not getting a six-piece order instead, and they’re definitely an upgrade over Jack’s Classic French toast sticks, which are the same price.

So, whatever time it is, it might be worth your time to get Jack in the Box’s Cinnamon Sugar Churro French Toast Sticks.

Purchased Price: $2.50*
Size: 3-piece order
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 250 calories (no other nutritional information is available on Jack in the Box’s website).

*Because I live on a rock in the middle of the Pacific Ocean, things are a bit pricier here. You’ll probably pay less than I did.

REVIEW: Monster Reserve Peaches N’ Crème Energy Drink

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If Monster Ultra Peachy Keen with its peach gummy ring flavor didn’t exist, I could be convinced that this was peaches AND crème. But because they have similar flavor profiles, I question whether there’s any crème-iness. It doesn’t look creamy or have any flavor notes of something that could be considered “crème.” I hoped it would be there because Monster did it with its Reserve Orange Creamsicle.

If you’re unfamiliar with Monster Reserve, it’s basically the original Monster with a different flavor. The name makes it sound extravagant, like it uses spring water that’s been filtered through miles of volcanic rock or that it’s been crafted in gold vats by the most experienced energy drink brewers on Earth. But it’s just a way for Monster to come out with new flavors of its original energy drink.

Monster Reserve Peaches N’ Crème is basically a sugary version of Monster Ultra Peachy Keen, and that’s perfectly peachy keen with me. But would I drink this regularly over Ultra Peachy Keen? No, because if they’re equally enjoyable, why drink the one with more sugar? But that’s just me.

If you hate artificial sweeteners, you might think you’ll enjoy Reserve Peaches N’ Crème. However, I’d hate to burst your peach-shaped balloon, but this also has some sucralose, although it’s not noticeable.

Monster Reserve Peaches N’ Crème Energy Drink is a tasty addition to the Reserve line, even though it lacks a “crème” flavor.

Purchased Price: More than one should pay on eBay
Size: 16 oz can
Purchased at: eBay
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 can) 120 calories, 0 grams of fat, 360 milligrams of sodium, 32 grams of carbohydrates, 28 grams of sugar (including 28 grams of added sugar), 0 grams of protein, and 160 milligrams of caffeine.

REVIEW: Taco Bell Cheesy Chicken Crispanada

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While others were gearing up for the Super Bowl, I was busy with my own personal Super Bowl, the Taco Bell Live Más LIVE event, which featured a whole lot of product news, including the announcement of the limited-time-only Cheesy Chicken Crispanada, a delightful bit of wordplay whose combination of “crispy” and “empanada” lives gamely up to the legacy of such hero portmanteaus as the “quesarito.” But is its taste equally impressive?

As a quick, handheld, Mexican-inspired comfort food packed with carbs, meat, and cheese, this offering fits perfectly into Taco Bell’s menu, but that familiarity has the downside of rendering it not particularly exciting.

Though this is a savory snack (unlike Taco Bell’s previous empanada, the no-longer-available Caramel Apple variant—RIP), the fried dough coating glistened in a way that reminded me of sweet treats like zeppole or beignets. My first bite of the crispy corner had a surprisingly deep, almost nutty flavor. I had expected the outer shell to be little more than a vessel for what was within, so I was intrigued that it had such a distinctive character. And that snap when I bit into it certainly lived up to the crispiness promised by the name!

Of course, I couldn’t get the whole picture without tasting the inner contents. Unfortunately, I also couldn’t taste the inner contents without burning the heck out of my tongue (and my hand when I accidentally allowed some of the molten filling to leak out, but that can probably be chalked up to user error).

This delicacy was fittingly, as the kids would say, pretty fire. (For my fellow olds, that means it was good!) The seasoned shredded chicken swims in a sea of cheeses, of which my discerning palate could pick out two different types: orange and white. Taco Bell’s press release, helpfully, is a bit more specific—the blend contains cheddar, mozzarella, and “Monterey pepper jack.” (I thought “Monterey Jack” and “Pepper Jack” were two separate things, but eh, I’ll bite my already-burnt tongue.) The press release also sings the praises of the presence of garlic, tomato, and onion, but honestly, I didn’t notice those at all. Oh, and if you want to add some additional hot flavoring to that hot temperature, the Crispanada comes with a side of Spicy Ranch sauce.

This all tastes pretty yummy, so perhaps my biggest complaint is that the filling didn’t, well, fill the entire empanada. It was primarily slathered onto one side, leaving most of the meal hollow. That airiness, combined with a portion on the more diminutive side, means that if you’re trying to make a meal of this, you’ll probably want to order two. You could also just opt for the Cheesy Chicken Crispanada Deluxe Box, which, in addition to its namesake, nets you a Chalupa Supreme, Beefy 5-Layer Burrito, medium fountain drink, and an order of Cinnamon Twists.

Ultimately, this item isn’t revolutionary, but it doesn’t really need to be. Those who generally like Taco Bell’s cheesy, chicken-y confections will enjoy it, and those who don’t… well, at least they can look forward to everything else announced at Live Más LIVE, like Baja Blast gelato!

Purchased Price: $4.49
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 280 calories, 15 grams of fat, 30 milligrams of cholesterol, 520 milligrams of sodium, 24 grams of total carbohydrates, 2 grams of fiber, 3 grams of sugar, and 11 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Kellogg’s Frosted Bran Cereal

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Kellogg’s new Frosted Bran is made up of crunchy bran flakes with a perfect amount of sweetness. A part of me wishes it was called Frosted Flakes Bran with Tony the Tiger and the Sun giving each other a high five on the front of the box, with the tagline, “They’re gr-r-reat…for your digestive system.” What could’ve been!

Don’t let the sun smiling on the box fool you into thinking these are the exact same bran flakes found in Kellogg’s Raisin Bran because they aren’t. While they are not as frosted as those found in Kellogg’s Frosted Flakes, there’s enough of a coating to make them sweeter and crunchier than what’s in a bowl of plain ol’ Raisin Bran.

But here’s the thing, it tastes like Kellogg’s took the sugary coating from the raisins and then put them on the bran flakes because the cereal is not sweeter than regular Raisin Bran and has the same fibrous flavors as the classic cereal minus the raisins. That sweet coating also prevents the flakes from getting soggy the instant they’re introduced to milk, which happens with regular bran flakes.

To be honest, there needs to be a Frosted Bran with Raisins because it would make eating Raisin Bran less annoying and more tasty. I’ve let out so many sighs when I end up with raisin-less spoonfuls of bran mush that I probably let out enough air to blow up balloons for a child’s birthday party.

As for nutritional differences between this and Kellogg’s Raisin Bran, a one-cup serving of this new cereal has 150 calories, 5 grams of fiber, and 10 grams of sugar. While a serving of the original has 190 calories, 7 grams of fiber, and 17 grams of sugar.

I’m surprised by how much I like Kellogg’s Frosted Bran, but I don’t know if I should be surprised. After all, I like Raisin Bran when I can secure at least one raisin on my spoon. It has the right amount of sweetness, and its sugary coating helps maintain a decent crunch. I wish it came in a bigger box, but overall, I think this cereal is gr-r-rand…for your digestive system.

Purchased Price: $4.49
Size: 12.7 oz box
Purchased at: Safeway
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (1 cup w/o milk) 150 calories, 0.5 grams of fat, 0 grams of saturated fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 200 milligrams of sodium, 36 grams of carbohydrates, 5 grams of fiber, 10 grams of sugar (including 9 grams of added sugar), and 3 grams of protein.

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