REVIEW: Goldfish Seasoned Pretzels

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Goldfish Seasoned Pretzels packaging

Sweet, salty, spicy, or seasoned, there is a school of Goldfish for every snacker. Its latest endeavor: Seasoned Pretzels, available in Honey Mustard and Hot Buffalo varieties.

The pretzels are a little larger than standard Goldfish crackers, with seasoning uniformly coating their golden pretzel surface. The seasoning looked thorough without being heavy, and I wondered if the seasoning could a) coat my fingers like Cheeto dust or b) be enough to stand up to the pretzel.

The answers to my questions are no and yes, respectively. While the seasoning looks light, the flavor is—as the packaging promises—bold.

Goldfish Seasoned Pretzels Honey Mustard close up

The Honey Mustard variety achieves the perfect balance of sweet and savory, which pairs perfectly with its pretzel base. The seasoning has the slight bite of Dijon mustard, but it isn’t overly pungent. As a honey mustard lover, I found these fish dangerously easy to eat.

Goldfish Seasoned Pretzels Hot Buffalo close up

Hot Buffalo is a little tangy and a little hot. It mixes vinegar with cayenne flavor that results in a tingly, slow-building heat that never scorches. Even after munching more fish than a hungry sea lion, I found that the flavor remained palatable and didn’t cause a bothersome aftertaste. The flavor was similar to Goldfish Frank’s Red Hot crackers, but without the cheesy cracker base.

Goldfish Seasoned Pretzels crunchy

The texture of both flavors is also wonderful. Even though the oven-baked pretzels are light and snackable, they are satisfyingly crunchy. Their centers are dense without being a threat to your dental work.

Goldfish Seasoned Pretzels remind me of another pretzel product: Snyder’s Pieces, specifically the Honey Mustard & Onion and Hot Buffalo Wing varieties. Snyder’s Pieces are irregularly-shaped bits of pretzel, seasoned so that the flavor can coat and seep into the non-crusty bits. I remember the Snyder’s product as somewhat oily or buttery-tasting, with a richness that feels heavy even after a small serving. Even though both products offer bold flavor, I would choose Goldfish next time.

Goldfish Seasoned Pretzels many fish in the sea, I mean, on the paper towel

There may be plenty of fish in the sea, but Goldfish Seasoned Pretzels are a catch. The light, crunchy snack is like the pretzel version of Flavor Blasted Goldfish: generously seasoned and a little more exciting than your usual lunchbox fare. If these fish swim to your grocery store shelves, reel them in.

Purchased Price: $2.79
Size: 8 oz bag (227 g)
Purchased at: Wegmans
Rating: 9 out of 10 (both flavors)
Nutrition Facts: (per 23 pieces) 140 calories, 5 grams of fat, 0.5 gram of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 350 milligrams of sodium, 21 grams of carbohydrates, less than 1 gram of fiber, less than 1 gram of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal

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Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal box

When I saw Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal on the grocery store shelf, I didn’t realize it was a new product. Even though it is new cereal season (and new ice cream season—the most wonderful time of year indeed), I thought I had tried the product before.

I may have gotten Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal confused with Peanut Butter Toast Crunch, which this site reviewed in both 2004 and 2013. However, Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal is a different product. Unlike the previous variety, which boasted a purely peanut butter flavor, Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal combines peanut butter flavor with the brand’s signature Cinnadust.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal back of box

The package doesn’t make this distinction obvious, unless you read the back of the box. I was not motivated to read the back of the box because I hadn’t done so since cereal boxes promised prizes inside. My cereal-related memory is so long that the only prize I look for now is added fiber.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal in a bowl

With the cereal’s identity clarified, Cinnamon Toast Crunch’s latest decennial experiment with peanut butter is just okay. The familiar toasty, crispy squares do not have a consistently noticeable amount of peanut butter flavor. The cinnamon sugar taste is more prominent, although the cereal appears to use less Cinnadust than standard Cinnamon Toast Crunch. The result is a lightly spiced, subtly nutty cereal.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal close up

If you are dubious about peanut butter and cinnamon complementing each other, the flavor combination works and is reminiscent of cookie butter. In this cereal, the flavors aren’t bad, just diluted. Imagine spreading peanut butter on your toast, scraping it off, and applying a little cinnamon sugar instead. Maybe you only have a few grains of cinnamon sugar left, or maybe a small gust of wind blows through your kitchen and lifts the Cinnadust right off your toast. What a way to start the morning—you should have gone with the fiber.

Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal in milk

In milk, the peanut butter wakes up and asks to be noticed. It still is light compared to other peanut butter cereals, but the milk gives the peanut butter flavor a richer, creamier vibe while weakening the Cinnadust. The cinnamon milk that gets left behind still satisfies.

Compared to original Cinnamon Toast Crunch or really good peanut butter cereal (see: Peanut Butter Lovers Reese’s Puffs), Cinnamon Toast Crunch Peanut Butter Cereal tastes like a partial attempt at both cinnamon and peanut butter. To everything, there is a season, and maybe Cinnamon Toast Crunch will produce a perfect peanut butter pairing next time.

Purchased Price: $5.69
Purchased at: Giant Eagle
Size: 12.3 oz (348 g) box
Rating: 6 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (per 1 cup) 170 calories, 4.5 grams of fat, 1 gram of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 270 milligrams of sodium, 32 grams of carbohydrates, 3 grams of fiber, 10 grams of sugar, and 4 grams of protein.

REVIEW: Milano Mango White Chocolate Cookies

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Pepperidge Farm Milano Cookies belong in a very specific, subjective category of accessible snack foods that I have always perceived to be a little fancy. Along with gold-wrapped Ferrero Rocher and snooty French Grey Poupon, Milano cookies have a certain air of elegance even though they share the same grocery store shelf as Oreos and Chips Ahoy. Everyone loves an Oreo, of course, but can they be called distinctive?

Milano’s line of white chocolate flavors has somewhat reinvigorated this stereotype of fanciness for me, and so finding its Mango White Chocolate Cookies felt like striking gold. The line includes Lemon, Strawberry, and Coconut flavors, all of which I have previously enjoyed.

Mango joins their tasty ranks, but with a caveat: the mango flavor is an imposter. There is a floral fruitiness to the cookies that is reminiscent of mango, but it lacks the fruit’s bright, tropical flair. If I were blindfolded (this is Milano, so I imagine the blindfold must be silk), I would guess the fruit flavor to be apricot. The subtle, honeyed flavor reminds me of the apricot jam-filled thumbprint or kolachi cookies available in bakeries, except with added sweetness from the white chocolate. If you manage to taste the orange-colored mango component of the filling separately, the tart pineapple-y notes are more discernible—but you may need to decimate the sandwich cookies to get there.

Of course, Milano cookies are known for their delicate, crumbly biscuits. The buttery vanilla cookies lend themselves beautifully to the filling’s flavor. While the filling only insinuates mango, it does yield a balanced, light, and sweet cookie that pairs well with tea. More mango flavor might overshadow the biscuit or rely on an overly artificial, candylike flavor, and how uncouth that would be for a so-called fancy cookie.

Milano Mango White Chocolate Cookies split

Milano Mango White Chocolate Cookies may fall short of the concentrated flavor burst that tropical fruit fans love, but they are still a worthy addition to the white chocolate product line. Of the flavors so far, I like them second best (after the exquisite Lemon variety) and humbly petition for raspberry and blueberry flavors too—please and thank you, Pepperidge Farm! While I should delicately savor these cookies per the line’s elegant aesthetic, I can’t promise I won’t devour them instead.

Purchased Price: $4.69
Size: 7 oz package
Purchased at: Wegmans
Rating: 7 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (2 cookies) 140 calories, 7 grams of fat, 4.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, less than 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 40 milligrams of sodium, 17 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 9 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein.

REVIEW: Caramel M&M’s Pop’d

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Caramel M&M’s Pop’d pouch

The freeze-dried candy craze has yielded some pleasant and strange surprises from major brands and small businesses alike. While freeze-dried Skittles or Lemonheads are tasty and fun, for example, I would argue that the freeze-dried Little Debbie Christmas Tree Cakes I once sampled are an abomination to both science and sweets.

Maybe we are still in the process of distinguishing what we can freeze-dry from what we should freeze-dry. As M&M’s enters the freeze-dried fray, I’m happy to report that the brand got it right on the first try.

Caramel M&M’s Pop’d in the pouch

Of all the flavors to work with, M&M’s Pop’d pulled a Peter Piper and possibly picked the perfect product to pop. Milk chocolate? Too basic. Peanut? Not great for freeze-drying. Enter Caramel M&M’s, which consist of milk chocolate and a chewy caramel center, two elements that, when freeze-dried, are familiar and yet transformed.

Caramel M&M’s Pop’d close up

The result is delicious. The expected flavors of milk chocolate and sweet, buttery caramel are recognizable, although lighter and less rich. I was expecting a dulled chocolate flavor, but it remains vibrant. The candy shell—so constant across all M&M varieties that it is almost boring—seems sweeter and more interesting in freeze-dried form.

Caramel M&M’s Pop’d innards

The real excitement of these candies is, of course, the texture. The M&M’s are light and crispy with grainy, airy centers that easily dissolve in the mouth. The caramel center is necessary to push this product from fun novelty to tasty treat. It reminds me of sponge candy, a light and crispy confection made with caramelized sugar that is so popular where I live that local shops sell t-shirts proclaiming, “You either love sponge candy or you’re wrong.” I will admit when I am wrong, but if polishing off these candies by myself is wrong, I see no point in being right.

Caramel M&M’s Pop’d in a bowl

My only qualm with M&M’s Pop’d is the higher price point that comes with any novelty. Depending on where you shop, you could pay as much as three times more per ounce compared to a bag of standard M&M’s. Because Pop’d candies are so light, it’s easier to eat more, which makes it feel like the product doesn’t go as far. Once I figure out a way to collect and use the candy dust that settles at the bottom of the bag, I may make M&M’s Pop’d a regular purchase rather than a once-in-a-while treat. If you have any ideas, please share . . . I’m getting close to the bottom of the bag already.

Purchased Price: $7.79
Purchased at: CVS
Size: 5.5 oz (155 g) bag
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: (per 1 oz, about 11 pieces) 130 calories, 5 grams of fat, 3.5 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, less than 5 milligrams of cholesterol, 45 milligrams of sodium, 20 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 18 grams of sugar, and 1 gram of protein

REVIEW: Kit Kat Peppermint Stick

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Kit Kat Peppermint Stick wrapper

In the shift from spooky season to holiday cheer that happens overnight, the junk food subculture marks the equally important transition from pumpkin spice season to the winter of merri-mint. While I stock my candy cupboard with mint chocolate like Andes or York Peppermint Patties year-round, the white chocolate (or, more often, white crème) and peppermint concoctions of the winter season represent a flavor pairing as timeless as milk and holiday cookies.

Kit Kat Peppermint Stick makes me wish these flavors were more accessible throughout the year, but if wishes were horses, we’d all enjoy free sleigh rides.

Kit Kat Peppermint Stick coating

The Kit Kat’s white crème base is a sweet combination of creamy vanilla and peppermint flavors. The peppermint is refreshing and noticeable, but not overwhelming. On the scale of pastel dessert mints to Life Savers Pep-O-Mint (which I cannot taste for more than three seconds without spitting them out and re-pledging my allegiance to Wint-O-Green), the minty strength lies slightly above an Andes mint. Anyone who likes mint but is wary of a toothpaste quality will welcome these Kit Kats to their holiday candy dish.

Kit Kat Peppermint Stick center

The Kit Kat’s pleasant creaminess does temper what could be a sharp peppermint flavor. The combination reminds me of peppermint ice cream, a milder version of the seasonal Hershey’s Candy Cane Kisses, or Russell Stover’s long-gone Rosebud Mints. If you still remember the latter, you may need to ask Santa for an anti-wrinkle cream this year.

Like many peppermint candies, Kit Kat Peppermint Stick contains an extra flourish in the form of “crunchy candy bits,” which are essentially crunchy red and green nonpareils. They add a light crunch and visual interest, but no additional flavor. I like them as an alternative to candy cane pieces; they don’t detract from the light crunch of the wafers.

In addition to the single-size bar, Kit Kat Peppermint Stick is available in a bag of individually wrapped snack-size pieces. Whether you are adding a festive flair to your holiday celebrations or hoarding candy under the justification that it contains peppermint oil and is therefore a useful digestive (Who would do that? Not me!), add Kit Kat to the top of your Nice List.

Purchased Price: $1.24
Size: 1.5 oz (42 g) bar
Purchased at: Walmart
Rating: 8 out of 10
Nutrition Facts: 220 calories, 11 grams of fat, 7 grams of saturated fat, 0 grams of trans fat, 0 milligrams of cholesterol, 30 milligrams of sodium, 28 grams of carbohydrates, 0 grams of fiber, 21 grams of sugar, and 2 grams of protein.

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